It all started almost four years ago, my big brother started to treat me badly but at a tolerable level – he only insulted me a bit and ignored me. It progressed but it became far worse after the death of our father. For you see, I was my dad’s favourite and my brother was ignored. My brother channelled his anger after our dad on me. It turned from the odd verbal abuse and shoving to frequent physical attacks (left minor bruises and marks but he didn’t use his full strength) and constant verbal abuse and treating me below an animal. This has been going on for one and a half years. I’ve complained to my mother, but she can’t control him. I pleaded my brother to be nicer to me and constantly tried to explain how I feel but the jerk thinks his behaviour is justified for me being ‘weird’ and ‘fat’ and for just for generally deserving it. I complained to teachers, after complaining for four months and writing a diary of his actions – the school sent social services around to talk to my brother. That only stopped him from suffocating me and punching me hard, but he still hits me with bottles, kicks or drops shoes at me, pushes me, blocks my way to anywhere in the house, bursts into my bedroom and refuses to leave, searches through my stuff, hits me with his ‘pimp cane’, pokes at my rolls of fat, slaps me rarely, yells at me, puts me down every sentence he talks to me, spreads rumours, unplugs my internet connection, locks me in the bathroom, bursts in the bathroom when I’m in *when mum is out*, he’s hit me twice with a belt, steals my food from Christmas stockings, insults my friends, always argues, thinks he’s always right, admires Adolf Hitler and Hannibal Lecter *I am being serious*, insults and makes me apologise for my flaws like ‘being a man’ *I am a girl, btw* ‘Being a fat b****’, ‘Being a coward’ and ‘being socially inept and retarded’. This has gone a bit off-topic in a way, I shouldn’t have mentioned Hilter and Lecter. But I’m stuck at the moment, nothing is stopping my brother. I’m stuck in this house constantly being bullied and it won’t stop. Yeah, sure it flares and rests but it is always there. I’ve been considering suicide and running away but I know I’m too much of a coward to do it. But I don’t want to go into care, because it’s my aspiration to become a Medical Researcher – you get kicked out of care in England at age 17. You have to A-levels before you go to university and you do A-levels at college from 16-18 but to do a-levels after being kicked out of care; you have to live in a bedsit working part-time to pay for a damp room in dank conditions. Relatives won’t take me. Let’s call one my aunts Wendy, she is too poor to look after me as she’s taking her son through a law-conversion degree. Let’s call another of my aunties Catherine, she lives in the south and is a toxic wife (please google the term if you don’t know what it means, you don’t have to though) she wouldn’t take another child on as she is so selfish. My mum’s side completely ignores her, partly because they are just mean and also my mum is severely bipolar. I pity the person who has to read these 573 words. Shortened Version: 1.) My 15 year old brother (I am a fourteen year old girl) bullies me constantly – he throws things at me, hits me with bottles and his ‘pimp cane’, blocks my way whenever I go past him, constantly puts me down for everything about me, spreads rumours, insults my ‘friends’, unplugs my internet connection when I don’t placate him, pushes me against walls when he feels like it, argues all the time, pushes the bathroom wall so hard it crumbles when I’m having a bath (He hates the noise I make in the bath which is actually small), slaps and insults me when I snack and steals and searches through my stuff. 2.) He is out of control, social services nor my mum can sort him out. 3.) I don’t want to go to care. 4.) Care, suicide, putting up with the bullying, or running away are my only options. No relatives would take me on. 5.) I am so desperate now, the bullying is becoming unbearable – I know it’s weak but I’m a weak person who can’t handle stress and takes things personally. I am a whiny cow.