And i once again have been arguing, and i know i can say some damn right nasty things im not innocent by a long shot. i do love him so much and i prob deserved what he said and i know he lost it with me badly. you see my boyfriend told me. "i hate you" "go ahead and kill yourself then... atleast your stopping texting me then!" i know deep down that he didnt mean to say those horrible things because the moment he said them he regreted them but now i cant help but feel really hurt over what he said. i cant help it maybe hes right? its put me back into so much traffic goiing on in my head it just wont stop hes trying to make it up to me but i cant see how he can? i pretend it didnt hurt and that i completely understand. but truth is. it did hurt. and i dont understand.