I've come to the conclusion that I'm completely unworthy of any help and support, hence I will do what I can to help people, and get others to help said people instead of me. It's all I have left, and last night proved it. I only didn't end up in hospital because I saw someone else's post and chose to write (a rather crap and probably quite unhelpful) reply to it instead. Heh, look at me. A site buddy who can't help others in any way. I wrote only 4 replies to the new posts today - 4 out of nearly a hundred posts, and none of them were any good. I can only write about myself, and even then it's without much sucess - the one time I managed to explain how I felt, no-one replied and I probably triggered most of the people who read it. Even now I can't explain how I feel. I don't even know if I feel. If I can't even explain that without hurting people, how can I ever get help? If I can't do that one little bit of work towards help, do I deserve it? Probably not. I deserve this pain, these memories.