My dad passed away last night

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by SnowFallenAngel, Sep 26, 2012.

  1. SnowFallenAngel

    SnowFallenAngel Well-Known Member

    My 90 year old dad passed away last night after a few days in hospital with fluid on the lungs and chest infection. Both my sister and I were there....only just. RIP dad, I did love you but never told you.
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    OMG! cannot say how sorry I am to hear this having lost a much loved dad a mere 23 months ago.
    My heart and thoughts go out to you :hug:
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hugs to you hun your dad knows you did not have to say words hun
  4. ACPhilosopher

    ACPhilosopher Active Member

    My heart goes out to you. My mom died a little over a year ago and even though she was 93 years old and I am over 50 myself, there is just this giant void in my heart where my relationship with her used to be. Don't let anyone tell you that you shouldn't feel pain because the person was old and lived a long life. It hurts just the same. After all, we don't want our loved ones to get old in the first place, much less die and leave us. I don't know who wrote the script for life on this planet, but I could sure do without the part of the story where we all get old and die.
  5. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    I am sorry for your loss SnowFallenAngel - my stepdad is 90 and said today he's 20 years past his sell-by date....and looks on every day as a bonus :) But he has great faith that when his time comes it won't be the end of his internal life (soul, spirit etc.) because of the promise made by the Person who did write the script for our life on the planet and who has communicated everything we need to know about essentially not dying when we (our bodies) wear out.

    I do appreciate that many think this is just hogwash or old wives' tales etc..... but I didn't write the book, I just believe it and rejoice in the real hope it brings :)
  6. Struggler_

    Struggler_ Active Member

    My sympathies, but rejoice in the fact that he lived a very long, and I'm sure happy, life. My father passed at the early age of 39 due to complications dealing with alcoholism, while I was only 11. Your father may have passed, but despite the loss, know that the two of you had what many, many others didn't.

    That last part came out sounding wrong. Just know that you and your father had a long life together. All relationships come to an end. Try to consider the fact that yours was so long.

    Again, my sympathies.
  7. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    I'm so sorry to hear! I'm thinking of you. :hug:
  8. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    My deepest sympathies to you. It is so difficult losing a beloved parent. No matter what age they are. Keep the good memories close to your heart and recall those times when things seem rough. Thinking of you. :hug:
  9. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    I am so sorry for your loss...there is a very special bond with an aged parent (for me a grandparent), a wisdom and a love that cannot be matched...after 20 years, I continue to live the lessons my grandma taught me...but I still miss her each day..I was fortunate to find a bottle of the perfume like the type she had worn at a flea market several years ago...when I am down, smelling it and remembering how much I was loved has become my teddy bear...hold him dear in your heart, and know that words are not the only way we express our love (like you, there was a person dear to me who I discovered not too long ago had died, and I never thanked her nor told her how much I loved her; I now try to include in texts to those that I love, ILU quite often so I never forget again)
  10. ACPhilosopher

    ACPhilosopher Active Member

    Here is a book that you might find comfort in:

    "The Orphaned Adult: Understanding And Coping With Grief And Change After The Death Of Our Parents" [Paperback]
    Alexander Levy (Author)

    It's about coping with the loss of your parents as an adult, and all the feelings that go along with that, which people don't discuss very often because we think it's natural for old people to die and adults shouldn't still need their parents. Both my parents have died and I could relate to a lot of things in this book.
  11. exkend

    exkend Well-Known Member

    My condolences to both you and your sister at this time.

    God Bless
  12. SnowFallenAngel

    SnowFallenAngel Well-Known Member

    Thank you all so much for your condolences and thoughts, they are much appreciated.