My evil imagination(horrible trigger)

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the_me_that_you_know

#1
I know my imagination is too vivid.
There are pros & cons, the worst being I can imagine exactly how it would feel if anyone were to kill me. I used to have long hair and a resemblance to Jesus Christ-which only lead me to thoughts of how it would feel if I were to be crucified.
Suffocation, decapitation(that should be a quick death), lungs filling w/ water as I drown, or filling w/ warm liquid from a punctured lung & drowning in my own blood, an axe in the back/front/head/face/where ever, metal baseball bat to the dome(repeatedly, now that's real pain), broken nose/bones or jagged bones sticking through my skin , the list does not end there.
I can even imagine burning to death, only I've read/heard that the pain stops when the burns pass the 3rd degree(what a Trip, being on fire & not feeling anything)... ah, yes... how could I forget. Bullets to the body. :ohmy:
I always wonder how long you feel the bullet to the brain though, and I wonder how much time you feel a hole in your brain for, or if the brain dies instantly. And dying instantly... imagine a tv turning off/going out... only it's not a tv, it's your mind/life. That's what I think/feel/know it is to die. :blink: All of this is kinda like a curse, I didn't ask for it. It just happened. And it can't be very healthy at all for me, :sad: but I am determined to make something positive come of it.
 
#2
I'm sorry you feel like this hun. Have you spoken to anyone about these thoughts? Please don't act on them. PM me if you would like to talk :hug:
 
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