My Final Thread, Me The Annoying Hypocritial Troll

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Forgotten_Man, Jul 20, 2012.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I posted this post in my blog. I swear this will be my last thread ever. I also want everyone to know that this does not mean I am going to try and kill myself. I am just saying that there will be no more threads from me on this forum.

    So for the past couple of months I have gone on and on about how I am just broken. How no matter what I do with my life I will never get better. I cannot do anything to escape my destiny and all that crap. With that over the past couple of months people keep on telling me that I am wrong. How I can do anything I want if I were to just try and put forth the effort. So yeah I admit it. Deep down in my heart I know very well that I could probably get better if I really applied myself. You know, maybe I won't even say probably. I know I would get better. I mean back when I started crossfit in April I could not do dead-hang pull-ups. With lots of patience and training I am not able to do 3 in a row on a good day. Not many but considered I could barely even lift my arms when I first started it is better than nothing.

    So yes I openly admit it. I could help myself, I could save myself, I could get what I want. However, I choose not too. I am choosing to be a hypocrite from here on out. I will keep on believing what I believe about my life. I will keep on complaining about my life. I will keep on bitching about how I am so worthless. I will keep on talking about how I will kill myself when my cat dies. I will keep on doing all of that knowing full well that I can fix myself if I wanted too. I just choose not too. So I admit to it.

    One day I will kill myself, hopefully sooner, rather than later. I would never wish death on my kitty, but if it happens sooner rather than later I will not be sad, I will be happy because that means that I can release myself from this worthless existence. The only reason I am going to kill myself is because I do not have the ability to seduce females NOW!!!! Not a couple years from now, not a couple weeks from now, hell not even a couple days. It is not now therefore my life is meaningless and I need to die. That is the one and only reason I have to die. I have a good career, I can support myself, and my hobbies. However, that is all meaningless unless I can get a female to help me ejaculate using her vagina. There is no other reason at this moment nor will there ever be any other reason. I am too cheap to get prostitution so do not even suggest it. I am talking about the skill to go out and seduce females without money. A skill I did not learn in high school and will never learn. I choose to not learn it now and I will die because of it.

    Feel free to try and sway me one way or another. However, there is nothing that can sway me. I am gone, I have checked out, I am on auto pilot until my cat dies. Do not feel obligated to leave me any messages in my threads. Treat them as me just wasting space. Me just being a hypocritical ass hole who wants to make everyone around him suffer. Because that is all I am, and that is all I will ever be. There is no reason for anyone to advise me or do anything like that. I am just screaming and people can ignore me.
     
  2. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    I actually did happen to read your diary entry. And I have to say congratulations for realizing what many people never do - that you are making yourself miserable in spite of the fact that you have the power to change your life, because you choose to be miserable. That is a powerful revelation, even if you don't do anything to change it. At least now you know yourself, you know the truth. So maybe the truth doesn't necessarily set you free, but as miserable as the truth may be sometimes, it's better than living a lie.

    I've never known how to seduce women either. It's not even a skill I could learn, because I lack the basic confidence to even approach a strange woman or look her in the eye. I suppose you could say I've managed to attract women online, at least... in fact, one of them was even willing to marry me... so maybe personality was never my problem, it was my approach. The fact that my personality does not translate well in person. Oh who am I kidding... nobody I meet in person even knows my real personality until they have known me for years and I feel completely comfortable around them. Basically, I have accepted the fact that I will never have that skill, the skill to impress and seduce women, to win friends and influence people. Even if I have the tools to do so, I will never have the confidence to properly utilize them. I'm sure I could be dazzling and charismatic if I wasn't such an insecure, shy, miserable schmuck. This is my own fault.

    But stop for a minute here, think about what you're saying. You're saying that you want to die because you can't convince a woman to sleep with you... you're not talking about a relationship, you're talking about sex. You do realize that sex is not going to make you happy, right? And if sex is all you want, why the insistance on getting it without money? You can buy sex. You can go to any bar at last call and find a drunk horny woman who will have sex with you. These things do not require superior seduction skills. I'm about the least seductive man on the planet, and I have had plenty of drunken women fawning over me, undoubtedly because they were too drunk to know better. But is that really what you want? You're upset because you're not Don Juan? Even Don Juan isn't Don Juan. That's a fantasy, and not a very satisfying one at that. Yes, there are men out there who manage to get lots of women to sleep with them. And most of them are shallow, morally bankrupt, emotionally vacant, manipulative men who probably aren't much happier than you or I. You think an orgasm - something that for men lasts 5 or 10 seconds at best, is going to make you happy? These men end up with sexually transmitted diseases and children that they will never meet... is that really how you want to live your life? If they're so happy, why the constant need to move on to another conquest? Sex is just a game for them. They're not happy... in the same way that a rich man is never happy with the money he has, they always want more.... more, more, more. They are never satisfied, because that kind of lifestyle can only satisfy you momentarily before you get bored and start thinking about getting your next fix.

    Now consider on the other hand, relationships. Relationships have been known to lead to sex... along with the added benefit of a relationship. Someone that you have feelings for, and who has feelings for you. Relationships don't require a great degree of seduction ability; believe me, if they did, then no woman would ever want to be in a relationship with me. Don Juan I am not. But that doesn't matter. Have I had opportunities to have sex? Yes. But I've turned them all down. Because I know that meaningless sex is not going to make me happy. Oh sure, it might be fun and feel good, but it's not going to emotionally fulfill me. You're going about this all wrong. You're seeking sex in the hopes that it will turn into a relationship, when you should be seeking a relationship and hoping it will eventually include sex. I'm about to say something that may offend some people here, but I have to be brutally honest - the type of woman who will have sex with you before you're in a relationship with her is not the type of woman you want to be in a relationship with. I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound mean or judgmental, I know there are reasons why people have meaningless sex, but it's usually a sign of deeper psychological issues when somebody is willing to sleep with someone they hardly know. This so-called "seduction" skill that you're talking about is really little more than a way of manipulating promiscuous women. Is that really what you want, or is it just what you think you want? I'm not advising you, I don't expect you to give any thought to what I'm saying, but in my humble opinion, you seem to be confused about how the world works and deluding yourself about what you think would make you happy. The ability to seduce a woman into having sex with you will not make you happy, and in fact if you make that your life's sole purpose, you will only succeed in making your life even more shallow, vacant and meaningless than you already think it is.

    Just my 2 cents. Sorry if I managed to offend you or anyone else here, that was not my intention, though I know that sometimes when giving an honest observation, people can sometimes take things personally. I don't expect you to take anything I've said to heart because as you said, you have already made up your mind to focus on this one issue, and I doubt that anything I say is going to sway you. I just think you're selling your life short by throwing it away in pursuit of what I personally think is, quite frankly, a really fucking stupid cause. But hey, it is your life, and it is yours to do with as you wish.
     
  3. Lps

    Lps Well-Known Member

    Hey - as a girl I just want you to know. Women LOVE men. And the universe is full of women SEARCHING for men. There's something really great about "belonging" to another human being. It's incredible. it transforms. Everything.

    Sometimes men are VERY picky about who they'll love. And that discounts a lot of great women. If you're Mr. America, do the beauty queens. Otherwise, be open to loving a woman who MATCHES you. Have a kind heart. If you want a woman that hits the gym, you have to earn that by working out and being YOUR best. I just gotta say again: Women. Love. Men. Just approach and say hi. That's all it takes. No game, no secrets, no show. Just authenticity and good hygiene. :) Love.
     
  4. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    @Lps: I am glad to see that people are still telling me to settle. Too bad you are wrong about there being no game. I have the authenticity and good hygiene. Yet oddly enough no female wants anything to do with me. So I can safely say that you are wrong about that. If that was all I needed I would not be in this situation.

    I do find it funny how you talk about many great females being ignored. Does it ever occur to them that there is more to being an attractive mate than just having a good heart?

    @TheLoneWolf: Umm thanks, I guess, about the whole congratulating me thing. I figured I would rather stop living the lie. Plus I know it will upset people more when they find out that I knew I could fix myself after I am gone. I plan to include that in my suicide note.

    I am insistant on not buying sex.. well I guess it is an ego thing. I want a female to want me, not my money or not just wanting anyone because she is drunk and does not care. That is why I insist that I do not want to buy sex with flat out cash. Then again, unlike you I have never been hit on in a bar by drunk females. So I have never had the option in the first place. I just get passed over like always. No I do not want drunk females fawning over me, I want sober ones fawning over me. Is that so much to ask?

    I like how you describe those men... because guess what I am pretty emotionally vacent, shallow. In many ways I want to catch an STD. That way I have something that will kill me. The kids thing kind of scares me. However, I do not want kids. So if I ever had them and never met them I would not give a damn. I am not one of those sentimental assholes.

    As for your whole orgasm bit. That is just one part of sex that I like. I like sex from start to end. Not just the end part. So I get anywhere from 5 to 60 minutes of enjoyment.. depending on how many times I have had sex during the day. Way more than that 5 or 10 seconds you describe. I am not some putz who only cares about the orgasm.

    As for relationships, sorry I want sex first. The problem is just because I am with a female I like does not mean my sex drive suddenly disappears... like it seems to for so many males on this forum. Nope it sticks around. Now all females, will toss my sex drive right back in my face if I wait for sex. You come after them for sex more than they want and suddenly you are only about sex. Plus what is so wrong with wanting a female with a sex drive to match my own?

    You see the problem with your theory about females, is that most worthwhile females out there are benching themselves because they fell for the same tactics that get the dumb girls too. They fall for them, and then get dumped and hate all men. I have seen what it can do, my mom was one of those females. All she can ever talk about is her perfect GPA from school and how all her boyfriends did not like how smart she was. Then she was left with me after being played by my dad. Which left me with a mother who hates men, who now has to raise a son. Regardless, that does not matter. My point is that this forum is filled with plenty of females who get played by the same tricks and tactics that this lesser females fall for. So clearly being a worthwhile does not make you immune to them.

    Thanks for being honest. However, I will now be honest. You and I are very similar. We want to see the world a specific way. Whatever way I do not think one can really be better than the other. Well I think my way is better because it gives a lot more room to people and does not require me to target females who I do not find physically attractive in the slightest. However, that is just me. So yes I will throw away my life on something empty and trivial because my life is already empty and trivial.
     
  5. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    It is healthy to see how you are sabotaging yourself, so I was sincere in congratulating you on that. I spent many years sabotaging myself and I always thought it was other people's problems, not mine. The problem was not them, it was me - well more specifically, it was my attitude.

    You know, I too would love for women to think I'm hot and sexy, but they're not going to think that because I am not, in fact, hot or sexy. I will never be a Johnny Depp or a George Clooney or whatever. I'm just not that good looking. I have to accept that. Do I wish I was good looking? Sure, but looks only take you so far. I can't tell you how many attractive women I have instantly lost interest in once I realized how ugly their hearts and personalities were. If you're asking to be a man that women everywhere are clamoring to be with, I'll tell you right now, unless you look like some guy from an underwear ad, that's probably not gonna happen. And unless you're Bill fucking Gates, you're probably never going to be a billionaire, either. Give up the pipe dreams, man. That's not realistic, nor is it enough to bring you true happiness. You only think it is because you don't have it. But if you really are hell bent on attracting lots of women, the first thing you need is confidence, and I get the impression that you don't have a lot of that. So you're handicapping yourself from the start there.

    Hate to break it to you, but most STDs won't kill you. And I'm not quite sure why you think that men who care enough to try to be a good father to their children are somehow "sentimental assholes". I'd call them "decent human beings", but I guess that's a matter of perspective. I'm not a big fan of children either, but if I accidentally had some of my own because I had unprotected sex, then I would feel a bit of an obligation to help care for and raise them, because I know how having an absent father can fuck up a child. If I did have kids, I would want them to have a better childhood than I did. You don't have to go out there and make the world a better place or anything, but you shouldn't contribute to making it worse, either. And bringing more unwanted children into the world isn't going to improve humanity.

    Okay, as for the orgasm thing, I was being dramatic to make a point... yes, of course the whole thing is enjoyable... I don't have a lot of experience in this area, but I've done a fair share of fooling around sexually, and yes, it is fun. But you completely missed my point. You're basing your happiness on pure, hedonistic physical pleasure. I think you're confusing feeling good and being happy - they are not the same thing. Feeling good is important too, yes... and I never said that your sex drive should disappear, or that you should be in a relationship without sex, or that you should wait until marriage or anything like that. But going around sleeping with people you just met - this is not healthy. Of course I too want a woman with a sex drive to match my own... you seem to have mistaken me for a guy with an underactive libido. Nothing could be further from the truth. I'm a horny SOB. But I also realize how shallow and unfulfilling meaningless sex is. If you're just lonely or looking for a good time, fine, it's one thing to do it here and there. But it's not going to make you happy, is my point. Think about it: what would make you happier, going out and trying to meet a different woman every night to sleep with? Or finding someone that you really like and having sex with her 3, 4, 5 times a day, every day, then having someone that you have actual feelings for to cuddle with and talk to after the fact? Or maybe you're one of those guys who's going to call me a "fag" for wanting to cuddle with a woman. Yes, I want sexual intimacy. But I also want emotional intimacy and physical affection. I want to have my cake and eat it too. That's the kind of relationship that will keep you both sexually and emotionally satisfied, and that's what you seem to be missing here... too focused on the sex, and forgetting about all of the other vital aspects of human relationships.

    You're missing something about your own theory, there... yes, lots of good women fall for bad men.

    Read that again: lots of good women fall for bad men. Are you a bad man? Do you want to be a bad man? Because the women who go for men like that, will always go for men like that. They are not going to suddenly find themselves attracted to a nice guy. It doesn't matter if they're smart, successful, have a heart of gold or anything like that... if they're attracted to assholes, they will always end up with assholes, and they will always wonder why every guy they go out with is an asshole. You want to be with women like that? Be an asshole. Continue to perpetuate the negative image that they have about men. Go ahead and prove your mom right, if that's what you want to do.

    I never told you to go for women you aren't physically attracted to. Not sure how you managed to read that between the lines. Just because I said you should look for meaningful relationships with women that you care about - I didn't tell you to take a vow of chastity and date ugly women, did I? Lol... good lord. You're right, we are similar... and I used to be quite the extremist like you, seeing the world in black and white. The world is not black and white. It is not looks OR personality... it is not sex OR love... you can in fact have both at the same time, you know. But if you're looking for sex without any emotional attachments, if you're looking for women who allow themselves to be used like that, then basically what you're saying is that you want to be a player, a manipulative man who takes advantage of women, including many worthwhile women who should know well enough to avoid guys like that, but don't... what I'm saying is that it sounds like you want to be one of those jerks that give men a bad name and that good women are always complaining about. I don't think that's what you really want... I don't think that's what your mother would have wanted you to be either. But again, like I said, it is your choice. If that's what will make you happy... there are already plenty of men like that out there, so what's one more, right? Well, you have fun with that. In the meantime, I'll be looking for a good woman who doesn't fall for that bad boy bullshit. Believe it or not, there are plenty of worthwhile women out there who know better. So maybe I'm limiting my options a bit, but if there's one thing I've learned, it's that being with the wrong person will never make you happy. I'd rather wait for the right one.
     
  6. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I figured you were complimenting me. It just feels kind of odd. Then again, I guess most people would congratulate others if they found they were in charge of their own destiny. So I guess it makes sense, so thanks.

    You know it is kind of funny how many guys talk about how ugly females hearts are. You know, I am such a loser that I have never even been able to get to that point with any females. Well one, but I guess that is just how thing are. I cannot ever use the plural. Yeah I know that I have a pipe dream. Since I cannot have the pipe dream, I am going to die. I mean if you cannot have your dreams why even bother living right? I know that even if I were to become in shape enough to be a model. I would still not get any females because I would still not be attractive. So yes I have given up and once my cat dies I will not have to worry about it or thing about it because I will be dead.

    Well I am going to kill myself if a female ever has my child. I will even be evil enough to leave it in my will that my child receive a letter explaining to the kid that I killed myself because I did not want the kid. Men are so far removed from the reproductive process it does not matter.

    You seem to not understand me. I do just fine without human relationships. If I had the knowledge and experience that I could get females to sleep with me then I would be fine. I could know that I am alone because I choose to be. Not because I am such a worthless piece of crap that no one wants me. The quantity is what matters so yeah I would rather have one of whom I have sex multiple times a day with. However, in order for me to get something like that. I have to be appealing to females. Since I am not even that.. there is no reason to even worry about it right? Keep in mind that sex is just an excuse to make people upset at me for killing myself. That is what I want, that way my family and everyone hates me and forgets me and has an easier time getting over me. Well that or just make it an embarrassing for people to talk about or think about why I died.

    True enough, about the whole bad boy thing. However, let me make an observation to you. All these assholes and bad boys and all those people are a lot happier than me. So.. yeah I would become one of them if it would make me happy. However, I am not good at faking things. Most people would just see right through me so there is no reason to even bother or try.

    True, that is what I want to be. One of those guys who ruins females. It is funny how you mention my mom. I am pretty sure my mom gets off on watching me suffer like this. Because it is the only way she can get some kind of revenge on my father. Who pumped her, dumped her, and left her with me. So making a son of his into a celibate loser would make her really happy. Not only that making her daughters into females who use men would make her even happier. So I am sure she is getting what she wants. So lucky for me she is driving me to kill myself with her hatred of men. I guess that is why I see females as a set of holes for my dick. After all, it is the mothers job to make sure the male has a good impressions of females. I guess she failed right? Then it is going to kill me. That is good to know right.

    Regardless, I have decided to just let myself die. Like I have said I am waiting for my cat to die. There will be at least another couple of years before she dies. I am sure in that time I could make a complete turn around. However, I am not going to do anything but rot and continue to bitch and moan about how much I hate life and want to die. That is the just how things are going to work out. Because I would rather die than do anything about my current life.
     
  7. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    Yes, I was complimenting you. Better to be in charge of your own destiny than letting someone else, right?

    Don't get me wrong, there are a lot of good women out there. But you have to accept that women are just as human as men are. They are flawed and, yes, some of them are even evil. Part of your mistake is in putting them on a pedestal. I used to do the same thing, and you know what I found out? Women don't respect men who worship them. Plain and simple. It almost seems counterintuitive, wouldn't they want a man to think that their shit doesn't stink? Well, maybe some women would, but most don't.

    I guess if that's your dream, then that's your dream. Though I don't understand, if it's all about having lots of sex, why are you opposed to the idea of paying for it? It sounds like this is more about ego to you than actual sex.

    Yes, men are removed from the reproductive process, because our biological role is as protector and provider, not nurturer. A good father protects and provides for his children. But okay, I get it, you don't want to be a father; neither do I. Fair enough.

    Maybe you're right, maybe I don't understand you. I don't understand how a person could not be interested in human relationships. Why even bother socializing at all? Why even worry about sex? And again, if it's all about the physical pleasure, why not just pay for it? Why do you care about ego and being attractive to women when you're not even interested in human relationships in the first place? Just pay for what you want, get your rocks off and leave. Simple. And a lot less awkward than explaining to your date why you suddenly need to leave right after having sex with her, and then having to explain to her why you gave her a fake phone number when you run into her on the street. You don't have to be this hot, sexy, studly guy to attract a woman, if you could be happy with just one... but you might have to delve into that whole human relationship thing. If it's several you're looking for, then you probably do need to be a bad boy. And that's not something you can fake.

    You know why they seem happier than you? Because they don't give a damn. You do give a damn. You give a damn and yet you are trying not to give a damn. If there's one thing I've learned about myself, it's that I am who I am, and there's not much point in trying to be something I'm not. I've come to accept what I am, and all I'm looking for are people who are compatible with me... that whole human relationships thing again. Because that is something I care about. I guess I kind of feel sorry for you in that regard, because I think you're missing out. Sure, there are a lot of mean, stupid, vacuous people in the world, but there are good people too... you don't think you would enjoy being with a woman who shared your interests, who you enjoyed spending time with and talking to? Sure, sex is important too, but I would rather have quality over quantity, personally.

    Hey look, my mother has issues with men also. She's been divorced three times. I grew up with a single mom and a sister, both of whom got into and out of bad relationship after bad relationship while I remained a celibate loser. So perhaps we have more in common than you think. The difference is that I saw how unhappy my mom and sister are, and I realized that they were responsible for their own unhappiness. I realized that they ruined their own relationships. I realized that they were, quite frankly, shallow, stupid, and selfish. And I don't want a woman like that. If I decided to try to use women, I wouldn't be spiting my mom, I would become exactly the kind of guy that she tends to gravitate towards. And since I don't want to attract that type, I chose to go a different path. Granted, I'm not a doormat nice guy, either. I settled on something in between, and some women actually do find me appealing. Not a lot, mind you, but that doesn't matter. Like I said... quality over quantity.

    Well, your mind is made up, so I won't try to talk you out of it any longer. Yes, anything can change, but it's a lot less likely to change if you don't want it to. If I was a player, maybe I could give you some tips on how to pick up lots of women for meaningless sex, but I wouldn't know anything about all of that. I guess I probably could be a player if it was my life's ambition, but it's not. Though if that's your ambition, maybe you should go hang out with some of the pros and see how they operate. I had a good friend back in high school who could charm the pants off of any girl, quite literally. I saw how he did it, I could probably do it too if I worked on my confidence, but again - that's not what I'm looking for. One good woman is all I need, and you don't need to be a player to find that.
     
  8. truthhurts

    truthhurts Well-Known Member

    phew tht was quite a lot of reading on one go, tho i decided to go to sleep over an hour ago alrdy but well. u still seem to hav quite a lot of resentment towards women, as u did in some posts of yours i read before, tho i have to admit i havent been keeping track of a whole lot of posts of yours so i dont hav tht much insight to your mind, so to say. and well, i'm a woman so u prolly fundamentally don't like me, but tht's alright. if i'm getting something wrong here, feel free to correct me tho, since i'm only assuming things from what i just read here and what i remember reading before. one thought i keep getting while reading your texts is that u want women to find u attractive. but that wud contradict with the fact that u dont rly like women as beings. unless u see them as merely objects. but then again that wouldn't rly mean that u cud need them to look up to u, because objects can't do that, objects satisfy your physical needs, not mental. but having mentioned the 'ego' part in women liking your appearance and not your wallet, that wud almost make me think as if u seek women's attention not as objects but as actual equals, because what wud being looked up to really mean if the ones looking up to u are so much lower than u? well, i'm just basically trying to figure out how your viewpoint works because i find it to be pretty contradictive. i mean no offense here tho in case it seems like i do, i just don't fully understand u, because by your description of u, i think my state of mind is quite different, so it's a bit hard to relate to. i don't rly think u're fundamentally a bad person tho, even tho u seem to think so [which in itself i can understand]. i think it's good u're talking this through, even if u're not actually looking for a 'fix' in here, because it might give u further insight of yourself, which might help u aswell, to an extent. aaanyway, i hope this made at least some slight sort of sense, and i apologize for writing this while being quite sleep deprived. i personally find u to be quite an intriguing person, not perfect, but still humorous and actually caring, as weird as that might sound according to your self-image. well, i myself also have parts of myself that i pretty fundamentally hate, and i dont think i'll be in peace with them, and i don't really even want to be, and i also don't see myself getting rid of those parts anytime soon no matter how much effort i put in. but. im not planning to give up. tht's the one thing i will never do again, and tht's the one thing i'm sure of.

    [ps, i just love your avatar *-*, i've always found it immensely cute^^]
     
  9. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    @truthhurts: Hmm yeah you seem to have made one mistake. That mistake is that females only like me because I appear to be able to buy things for them. That is it, nothing more. They are repulsed by everything else, including my wallet. :confused: I am not sure where you got that females were attracted to me. Females are barely attracted to the prospect of free stuff from me to give me the time of day. So I hope that clears things up a bit.

    @TheLoneWolf: Hmmm I though I replied to you... oh well here is what I wrote

    I figured you were complimenting me. It just feels kind of odd. Then again, I guess most people would congratulate others if they found they were in charge of their own destiny. So I guess it makes sense, so thanks.

    You know it is kind of funny how many guys talk about how ugly females hearts are. You know, I am such a loser that I have never even been able to get to that point with any females. Well one, but I guess that is just how thing are. I cannot ever use the plural. Yeah I know that I have a pipe dream. Since I cannot have the pipe dream, I am going to die. I mean if you cannot have your dreams why even bother living right? I know that even if I were to become in shape enough to be a model. I would still not get any females because I would still not be attractive. So yes I have given up and once my cat dies I will not have to worry about it or thing about it because I will be dead.

    Well I am going to kill myself if a female ever has my child. I will even be evil enough to leave it in my will that my child receive a letter explaining to the kid that I killed myself because I did not want the kid. Men are so far removed from the reproductive process it does not matter.

    You seem to not understand me. I do just fine without human relationships. If I had the knowledge and experience that I could get females to sleep with me then I would be fine. I could know that I am alone because I choose to be. Not because I am such a worthless piece of crap that no one wants me. The quantity is what matters so yeah I would rather have one of whom I have sex multiple times a day with. However, in order for me to get something like that. I have to be appealing to females. Since I am not even that.. there is no reason to even worry about it right? Keep in mind that sex is just an excuse to make people upset at me for killing myself. That is what I want, that way my family and everyone hates me and forgets me and has an easier time getting over me. Well that or just make it an embarrassing for people to talk about or think about why I died.

    True enough, about the whole bad boy thing. However, let me make an observation to you. All these assholes and bad boys and all those people are a lot happier than me. So.. yeah I would become one of them if it would make me happy. However, I am not good at faking things. Most people would just see right through me so there is no reason to even bother or try.

    True, that is what I want to be. One of those guys who ruins females. It is funny how you mention my mom. I am pretty sure my mom gets off on watching me suffer like this. Because it is the only way she can get some kind of revenge on my father. Who pumped her, dumped her, and left her with me. So making a son of his into a celibate loser would make her really happy. Not only that making her daughters into females who use men would make her even happier. So I am sure she is getting what she wants. So lucky for me she is driving me to kill myself with her hatred of men. I guess that is why I see females as a set of holes for my dick. After all, it is the mothers job to make sure the male has a good impressions of females. I guess she failed right? Then it is going to kill me. That is good to know right.

    Regardless, I have decided to just let myself die. Like I have said I am waiting for my cat to die. There will be at least another couple of years before she dies. I am sure in that time I could make a complete turn around. However, I am not going to do anything but rot and continue to bitch and moan about how much I hate life and want to die. That is the just how things are going to work out. Because I would rather die than do anything about my current life.
     
  10. sadguy33

    sadguy33 Banned Member

    I have a lot of resentment towards girls and women too. It has nothing to do with me thinking they are a lower being or that I actually don't like them. I don't like them because they don't like me for whatever reason. It has nothing to do with being sexist its just that when they constantly hate me and like every other on of my friends its easy to hate them.
     
  11. TheLoneWolf

    TheLoneWolf Well-Known Member

    You did reply to me, and I read it and replied back, addressing the points you had mentioned. I guess you didn't read it. That's okay. I'm used to being ignored and wasting my breath apparently talking to myself.

    No worries... you have your reasons for being bitter, I have mine. The funny thing is that I think truthhurts has taken a liking to you in spite of your attitude, but you seem to brush her off as well.

    I would add more, but I won't waste my time since you won't bother reading it anyway.
     
  12. truthhurts

    truthhurts Well-Known Member

    @sadguy33 -> yea the way u just put it makes it a little clearer. my main point was that if one hates women, why is there still such a need to be liked by them, but i think i kind of understand that now.

    and TheLoneWolf -> i just think he's thinking of himself as this really horrible person, tho i'm sure he has good sides too. for example, he cares for his cat. that might not sound like much, but it still shows that he likes taking care of someone. and as for yourself, i think it's rly nice u've put such effort into talking to him here, the most difficult people to talk to are the ones who don't want to be helped. i hope u yourself are gonna be okay with things u're dealing with, and as far as i can tell, u seem to have a warm heart^^.

    and Forgotten_Man -> i still hope u're not gonna give up on your life, even tho u made it clear u aren't looking for help here. even if things with women aren't going as u'd like them to, there are still other things u enjoy doing, right? in the past u mentioned that u're a super huge anime fan, which i think is great^^, and u've also got your cat, and i'm not sure whether u really enjoy it, but working out is a very good thing to do as well. i'm sure the list goes on, tho i myself don't rly kno u so i don't rly kno much else. and maybe even after your cat is gone, u could get some other cat/pet [which i hope doesn't sound harsh], or just volunteer at some animal center, which i'm sure wud be pretty fun. im sure u cud still find joy in life even without being so appealing to women. so i hope u're gonna keep trying.
     
  13. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    @TheLoneWolf: I do so read every reply. Whether or not my mind can come up with a response at the time is another story.

    Ah ok, I guess my brain is... well somewhere else.. I have been feeling odd these past couple of days. Anyway, thanks for the compliment.

    Hmmm I guess I worship them in some way. Makes sense, granted I am not sure how I am worshipping them, but that is for someone else to know and me to not find out.

    Simple reason to not pay for sex is beause it costs too much. Yes there is my ego in there too. I mean who wants to go through life knowing they are the exact opposite of a desireable mate. I live that and that is what is leading me to suicide right? So yes there is my ego in this whole thing as well. I have had fantasies about getting a girl all nice and charmed up. Then just shutting down and telling her to go home. You know see how many times I could do that before they figure it out. Part of me wants to be the heart breaker as well. So there is that aspect of it too.

    I believe I hace come to accept that I am trash. That is why I want to die. That way I can remove myself from cluttering up society. You know free up a job, resources, living space. You know for someone more useful. Like that homeless person who screams at squirrels. I have accepted that is part of who I am and that is just how things are going to end up for me. Nothing wrong with that right? I figure once my cat dies I will just take out the trash.

    Do not get me wrong I want it to change. However, I am tried of trying and failing. So it is time for the world to change for me or I will die, that is all I can say. I have tried to change for the better several times and every time I am treated exactly the same. So now it is someone elses turn to change for me. Too bad that will not happen. Too bad I will just rot and take up forum space here too. That is just life, though, I have to live with the fact that I am hindering people who want to change and grow.

    @truthhurts: I thought this thread made things clear that I have already given up on everything? If that is not clear then let me make it clear. Unless someone else acts in my interest I am going to die when my cat dies.

    Yes I have other interests that I would have to give up with death one way or another. Plus if those interests were really enough to keep me going would I still be here? Yes I like anime and video games and my kitty. However, those are only temporary escapes. They are kind of like drugs. Even if I enjoy them a lot I have built up my tolerance to them. Thus they do not have as much effect on me anymore.

    I do enjoy working out. That is one of the prisons I make for myself. I imagine up some lines and then use lack of fitness as an excuse to not do things. Like going out and meeting females and fixing myself. After all, who would tell someone to give up a healthy lifestyle? Even if that healthy lifestyle will one day kill him?

    I am not getting another cat. It is wrong to put the responsibility for my life on another life. Nor will I ever volunteer at a shelter. I am too non-social for that. I would just be the creepy guy who likes cats. I would probably be targeted for black-mail. I know people at my crossfit gym have to force themselves to talk to me everytime I am there. So how would it be any different at a shelter. Why go outside and be miserable. It is twice as hard then. Because I have to put on that happy face and pretend like I am not going to kill myself.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.