Hi, I'm 19 years old and will be 20 this april. I have a 7 month old son and live in an apartment with my girlfriend. I've wanted to die for a very long time. My first attempt was at about the age of 16. Back then I thought slicing your wrist would kill you. I did get a bit smarter and did some research. I've overdosed on various pills several times. <Mod Edit, WildCherry: Methods> is the largest I believe. I thought I did my research well that time, but I am here typing today none the less. I have never gone for help, I dont believe anything can change my mind and no one would ever help me commit suicide. I have failed so many times that im scared to try. I live near a train now and everytime i hear it i wonder if i could lay on those tracks. ofcourse i researched that too and it seems unlikely. my luck the conductor would see me and stop the train. Jumping, drowning, and all those certain methods scare me too much, but i just cant stop thinking of ways to kill myself. my plan now is to try acetaminophen again, using a different method of taking the pills, or waiting til i am 21 and can buy a handgun. No one around me even cares anymore since i have been suicidal for so long. i guess they assume ill never do it. i wish i could prove them wrong.