My fucken fammily is a nightmare!!!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Summer.Rain, Feb 17, 2009.

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  1. Summer.Rain

    Summer.Rain Well-Known Member

    Hell, now i know why for the past 6 years i didnt managed to do any progress
    with my depression! My fucken dad, the leader of the family, is a stupid asshole
    Today i told him that i want to fly back to Israel so that ill be able to find a job
    or get dissability, or whatever, and my fucken dad was like:
    I will not send you to Israel because you lived there already and failed in everything
    (which is not true, i worked, i was treated, etc.. but i guess my fucken dad know better)
    Now, he dosnt want to spend money on my treatment here
    i cant work here (Ukraine) because i have no citizenship
    and i cant recive disability because:
    1. it takes very long time
    2. its only 100$ per month which is just enough if i live on the streets

    So i askd my dad how can he help me...
    and he said: I will find you a wife!
    OMFG what a stupid motherfucker!
    in my mental state
    1. No girl will date with me

    So i told him i wont do it, so what did he said?
    "Ok then go up into your room and disconnect the computer from the electricity"
    (even though its my fucken computer that i bough on money i earned
    but the motherfucker dosnt care and he want to fight me if needed)

    FUCK I HATE THIS FAMMILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Maybe i should run from the house...
    I dont have freands though, no relatives, no one
    and how will i survive on the streets? I have no skills...
    here in ukraine if you end up on the streets there is almost no way up
    unless you can do physical job, which i cant because i got back issues..
    And who will accept me to any diffrent job if i stink in dirty closing
    and with no citizenship
  2. mdmefontaine

    mdmefontaine Antiquities Friend

    hi...sorry things are so horrible for you right now. i wonder if you can just ''hide'' in your room until your dad calms down? leaving sounds really dangerous, unless you have a friend or relative to stay with, and you say that is not possible.

    are you an israeli citizen? note, if you are in ukraine, and with no citizenship, how could you qualify for disability there? just curious, thinking that if you were able to draw this amount and put it away - carefully - until you had enough to return to israel. can your mom help - without your dad knowing?
    (((and noting. . the last thing you need is a wife! right now - how could that possibly help your situation. . i am mentioning that only because it sounds as if your dad is not being rational . . . ) how is your relationship with your mom?

    sorry if i am not being helpful. i feel very bad about how things are going for you - and i wish i could help. i am here if you want to vent about it - and i care what happens to you. xxxx
  3. Summer.Rain

    Summer.Rain Well-Known Member

    Man my mom is more fucked up then my dad...
    She dosnt even recognize i got mental issues, she thinks im just lazy
    and yeah i know my dad is irrational, but i cant do anything about it :(
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    sorry summer, i dont have any advice i can offer you, but i am here if you need someone to talk to. I think it would be dangerous for you to just leave too:unsure:
  5. TheBLA

    TheBLA The biggest loser alive.

    My dad has also talked about me getting married soon to "help" me. He thinks it will help with my depression and loneliness but I know it would be "forced", I wouldn't love her, she wouldn't love me, she'd probably just marry me to come from India to America. I'm such a strange weird person and there is nobody out there for me that would like me for who I am. My dad means well but he still does a crappy job at it, that is what makes it so strange.

    I am betting it is the same for your dad as well, he means the best for you but just cannot understand your depression and what you are going through just like my dad and so when he tries to help you, it always backfires doesn't it?
  6. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Sorry Summerrain, You are in a tough spot.I can only agree that you should try to save money out of your benefits check until you can afford a ticket your self. I know how it is not being able to work. I have been thinking about some of these work from home jobs but I think alot of them are a scam trying to get you to send them money so you can receive their packet. My nephew is suppose to be working on opening his own buisness doing billing for doctors offices or entering transcripts for doctors into the computer. Haven't hurd anything lately about what is happening with that.
  7. ryanglander

    ryanglander Well-Known Member

    Take a deep breathe.

    Your problems are solid concrete problems that would get anyone upset, and seriously ill depending on how long.

    You are 24. You are unemployed. The economy is in a global depression. This is not an easy time to find work.

    Can you search for work where your at? Your in a very stressful situation and I can understand if your too upset too find work, as it can be very frustrating when job hunting and no one is hiring. And you are already seriously clinically depressed.

    Your father should not threaten to take away your computer, you're not a child anymore. Legally he is not allowed to take away your computer. But he is allowed to evict you from your home, and I don't know what your father is like so I can't elaborate as to what you should do. But I do know what you should not do. Don't physically fight him.

    Argue with him that you need your computer to find work.

    Could you sell things on eBay? Do you have personal items around the house you could generate some income with?

    Have you considered going to trade school? What about coming to the U.S?

    Sometimes we are in so deep that its difficult view our problem objectivley and consider what actions we must take to improve our life.

    Do you have any skills? Did you finish high school? What does your father do for a living? What are apartments like where you are at? Do you have any assets (money, car, collectables, anything of value)?

    You are in a slump, but with help you can climb out and take precautions to reduce the chance of getting ill again.
  8. noPoint

    noPoint Well-Known Member

    I'm almost in the same type of shoes.

    I would just say, look for and find a job. Get on the grind and start working.

    My dad once asked me, who are you talking too? When I was playing video games and yelling at them as usuall. He had the nerve to say this when he talks to himself all day. I haven't talked to him sense. But its a long line of situations like this that have caused me to not speak to him. Life isn't that fun for alot of people.
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