my life at the moment

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by samessexd, Oct 7, 2012.

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  1. samessexd

    samessexd New Member

    Right, where to start. I am 20 years old and have just broke up with my girlfriend of 2 and a half years. Throughout the relationship I was talking to other girls through the social networking site that the devil is 'facebook' I got found out several times and she still took me back after me saying I'll change. 2 weeks before we went on holiday I was making the effort to talk to another girl about current problems. On holiday, everything seemed fine. Had a lovely time. Then 2 weeks after we got back she ended it with me :(. Just as I realized what a wonderful girlfriend I had :(. Ontop of this my mum is recovering from a brain tumour and has been in and out of hospital so many times. So I have that on my mind too. X (my girlfriend) is the only one that can comfort me in this time of need :(. But I have put her through so much she can't. I have absolutely no one now :(. I have been trying my absolute hardest to prove to X that she IS the love of my life, but she says too much water has gone under the bridge. I don't understand how a partner of 2 and a half years can not be here for me especially with my mum the was she is. I need comforting :'( and I'm not getting it. I'm seriously thinkikng of starting to cut myself just to try and release some of this pain. Any one have an answer? I'm desperate :'(
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    She need some space you have hurt her again let her wounds heal ok In time perhaps if she see you have changed she will return but for now let her have some time to heal hugs
  3. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    I am sorry about your many difficulties at this time - it does seem that it is never one problem at once but several that always seem to come at the same time. maybe it seems like that simply because if it was only one thing than you can cope, it is when there a several conflicting problems it is much harder to cope. That is typically when we need help and support from others.

    On the girlfriend front - just as you can not help how "feel" sometimes, neither can she. I can not speak for her or to where her mind is at now, but it may be that too much water has passed the bridge now. Even if that is not the case and eventually things change then it is very unlikely it will be a fast change of heart and trust will be slow to come back. I will also point out that this is the typical age/time that high school love tends to wither as people grow into proper adults so there are several things working against that one. Try to be friendly and friends, but maybe a little space is needed. This may leave you without a support you want very much right now, but trying to force a change is not either - the 2 times you want something most is before you have it and once it is gone.

    The medical issues with your mum are completely beyond your control - are there other family members or friends that are involved with her that you may be able to get mutual support with?

    Cutting/self harm is not going to fix any of these issues, what it will do is make you feel worse about yourself, guilty, and weak. Not saying that it is weak, but that is by far the typical response and these feeling cause even more emotional pain that has no release. It is a neverending circle once that cycle starts. Try walks, hard exercise to the point of exhaustion and muscle burn, stuff like that - it will help alleviate the emotional pain and turn it physical but in a manner that helps in the long run with self esteem as opposed to hurting it. and keep posting here and feel free to rant or complain as much as you like - we are always willing to listen.

    Take Care and Be Safe

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