my life

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by teto, Jul 17, 2013.

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  1. teto

    teto New Member

    Hi everyone my name is terry.im 38 years old and i live in northern ireland.i have suffered from ptsd since 1998 when i was phisically assulted by three armed and masked republican terrorists.i was left partially disabled and my life was taken away from me.i may be talking to you now but for me it is an existence not what i would consider a life. The only thing that keeps me from ending my life are my children and my wife.everyday is so difficult to get through but by the grace of god i still have the strength to avoid ending my life.i was once very religious and god fearing but now i just fear my heart and my mind. I dont burden anyone else as to how im feeling as i know that i am loved and needed so i keep it all in.ive had family and at least 40 people i knew personally commit suicide.unfortunately the good old i.r.a have been a big facilitater in the suicide of many young men from the belfast area.infact i would go as far as saying that the ira used suicide as a strategic form of no bullets no blame.yes.not too many people outside belfast would know this went on.i for now am one of the lucky ones as i managed to escape their grip on my life.for such a small city belfast has a very high suicide rate.i have several plans on how to end my life,i dont care how painfull it may be i just worry at the lives that it will affect.and i hope that i can struggle through until god decides its my time.sooner rather than later.for death is easier accepted than suicide.suicide leaves loved ones with too many unanswered questions and double the greif.suicide breeds more suicides and in small tight knit communities it can wipe out entire generations.im on of the lucky ones so far and i hope i can maybe be a help to someone on this forum.everday is a battle but i wont let suicide win the war..
     
  2. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Hi and welcome to the site! I hope we can help you by offering support and a place to talk about how you really feel.
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi teto im sorry for so many losses you have had to face. Your right hun suicide breeds more suicide in a tight community so i hope you can show them all that that is not the way hun.
    I am glad you have such a supportive family who love and need you You can talk here anytime hun ok let some of the sadness out here so it does not build up inside you hugs
     
  4. teto

    teto New Member

    Thankyou .
     
  5. teto

    teto New Member

    Thankyou both
     
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