First of all, I'd like to thank everyone in this forum. Realizing I'm not alone is very good to my mental health or, shall I say, emotional health. I'm 17, but I'm pretty sure of what I want to do with my life- end it. Three years ago, I "suffered" a spine surgery. It was a high risk surgery who left me completely devastated- should a 14 years old deal with a deformed body? It's too much for a teenager. Any teenager. My social life is bad to say the least. I try to compensate that by having good marks- but even that is failing. I have nothing. Nothing. I always feel deeply sad, immensely sad. I go to school and I spend the lessons thinking about sad events of my life or blaming myself for things I did (or didn't do). I go to the bathrooms, during the break, and I cry compulsively. I have the impression that everyone thinks I'm dumb whenever I'm talking. My confidence is at the bottom. My life will always be like this. I have no capacities whatsoever to face life. What should I do?