my lonely weekend

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Aphorism, Nov 6, 2010.

  1. Aphorism

    Aphorism Well-Known Member

    i only saw my mother mother. i have a pretty good relationship with her, though, so i guess it was okay. but i'm just plagued with the thought of how pathetic i am, that i haven't seen anyone or done anything. and i don't really want to, either, other than to keep up this illusion that i'm sociable enough.

    i always feel the damn pressures of my peers, to constantly be in contact with others and hanging out with people. at the same time, i feel excluded a lot of the time, because a good lot of my friends that go to my school live in a neighborhood that is a drive away. and i don't know, i'm just not invited to stuff every weekend.

    i'm awkward, and i don't know. i see everyone all over facebook, constantly having friends and jokes. i guess i resent that, but i'm also feeling lonely.

    i'm so stupid, i don't have enough confidence to "fuck the rest" and disregard the happenings of others. nor do i have the guts to really initiate things with people.

    someone please give me a guide on how to survive being a teenager.
     
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    This is an awkward and difficult time...if you truly want to talk about how to establish relationships, please PM me...I have intimate, long term friends, so I do know something about this...big hugs, J
     
  3. nolonger

    nolonger Well-Known Member

    My weekends could be lonely, I don't really know. It's hard enough for me to realize what I'm feeling, :laugh:. The only people I see over the weekends are my siblings, and that's because we all live in the same house :mellow:.

    I'm pretty sure I don't have the illusion that I'm very social, I probly give off an aura of complete social reclusion. I don't have really any friends at school, more or less acquaintances. I don't feel an awful lot of pressure to be like the rest, I haven't been invited to anything from anyone at school for...years? Can't remember. My life basically consists of coming home each day and just going on the computer or lying in bed doing nothing.

    I have no self confidence/esteem and it's managed to develop into the undiagnosed anxiety disorder it is today. So I usually just avoid most things. Facebook....well I got an account on that site but I haven't touched it for a longgggg time, :laugh:. I don't have a camera or anything so I'm rarely in any photos, so it's not like I could upload anything. And everyone just seems so social and busy.....and I'm just so.....dead? Probly not the best describer but it's probly the closest thing I am compared to :tongue:.

    It gets to a point where I'd rather just lapse into a coma for a few years and see how everything turned out. Wouldn't mind it happening, a lot less grief and pain to indure.

    I hope things get better for you soon, or your life takes a more positive turn :) :hug: