i've often thought what it might feel like to kill some one or even myself. i've tried to experiment on mysel and dreampt also thought of killing some one. many ways of killing people I have thoght, also of myself. there has been no conclusive way. the end result is remorse and self regret, no good feeling would result, but motions would repeat and there was no respite. but I started to badly hurt myself and one of my good friends saw this, here initial reaction was of shock but she took time to understand me and talked me down/up from these feelings. her good will went so far but only fo far, so here I am with these feelings and am no closer to a result, she is here for me but her love can only go so far. S now i'm goig to live the next xhapter. I love you all take care my family.