My parents are completely oblivious

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Quietus, Apr 16, 2007.

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  1. Quietus

    Quietus Member

    Today was bad, like yesterday and the day before. These past few weeks actually, I've never been more depressed in my life and my parents either can't see it or don't want to admit it. I'm getting a lot of anger thrown my way on top of everything else. My mother is pissed off because I'm not talking to anyone, or leaving the house or generally doing anything constructive. She told me earlier that I have to make more of an effort to be nicer to my brother because "he's sick and you're not" - I suppose spending the entire day in my room listening to the trains pass and picturing myself getting crushed by one of them is healthy.
  2. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    You're right, they either can't see it, or they don't want to. If it is that they can't see it, you need to tell them exactly what is going on for you, how you feel, why, if you can, etc.

    If they don't want to see it then try going to the doctor and explaining how you feel and stuff, and then explain to your parents what the doctor has said and try to educate them about it.

    It sounds like they focus a lot on your brother. Can I ask what is wrong with him? They need help to accept that both their children are ill, and hopefully they will with time.

    Hang in there and keep fighting
  3. Panther

    Panther Well-Known Member

    I think it's difficult to know how parents feel or whether they realise you're depressed or whether they try and deny it. And it's annoying because you want them to feel the pain you're going through in some way and if they can't see your pain it doesn't make you feel better.

    And yeah it's difficult to be nice to people when you're depressed. But you're an important person. If you want to talk I'm here if you need :hug:
  4. meagainstme

    meagainstme Well-Known Member

    sorry i havent got words of advice, but i know how you feel.
    for years my mom didnt notice then when i admitted i cut myself she made a joke out of it. and now if i try and talk she gets angry or dismisses it.

    so i guess im saying you are not alone, and you always have us on here when parents let you down :)

    thinking of you :hug:
  5. girl_28

    girl_28 Member

    same here, my parents won´t ever admit that i have a problem, they just pretend that nothing is going on, that i am ok... i tried to go to a doctor but they won´t help me, they won´t change a thing or create a better environment for me to live in, they think that all what the doctor say is bullshit and that i am just being spoiled. I know how you feel and i am not sure about your situation but i want to let you know that we will hear you and try to understand because most of us know how it feels. i don´t know why your parents or mine won´t listen or want to pretend that everything is ok, i don´t know when they will realize that we feel so bad... i hope they do it before it´s too late.
  6. KathyLynnKilroy

    KathyLynnKilroy Active Member

    They don't see it. Whatever is going on with the brother seems to make them not want to see it.

    What this one is guessing is if efforts are made to enlighten the parents, it will only make the situation worse. What is needed is someone the op can really turn to to listen and be there for *them* because, quite clearly, their parents are not.

    And ... please don't ask how a woman who's never been to college knows all this. Us goth girls see a lot, and it's because we've been through more than most people could bear. It's what gives us our chirpy, high strung personalities. :biggrin:
  7. run4fun

    run4fun Well-Known Member

    when my brother committed suicide. it was obvious everyone was in denial. the investigator put it that way. and looking back it was probably one of only a few ways to wake our family up. i am not sure what else my bro could have done.
  8. Quietus

    Quietus Member

    Apologies for not responding after my last post guys, thank you all for caring I appreciate it.
  9. smackh2o

    smackh2o SF Supporter

    I can totally relate you there. They might have thier suspicions but they wont know how to deal with them or they might discredit them. Have you ever considered telling them your exact feelings. Words like, your brother is sick and you arnt must really dig deep and make you feel uncared about. What stops you from saying something and how long have you been suffering like this?
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