my parents

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by MourningAngel, Jan 10, 2009.

  1. MourningAngel

    MourningAngel Well-Known Member

    my b/f is 23 and i (16) don't know how to brake that to my parents. i'm scared of how they'll react. because on the one hand side my b/f couldn't come and visit me plus he said he'd brake up with me. even though the distance is fine for both of us, we agree that we sould meet sometime though.
    anyone an idea how to tell my parents? please, i don't want to lose him.
  2. stinkymouse

    stinkymouse Well-Known Member

    16-23 ..thats no big deal,just tell them the truth,if they are any kind of parents they will support you because they love you...although if he says he will break up with you,he doesnt sound like a very good bf to me!!!!
  3. Earn

    Earn Well-Known Member

    I agree if he saying he will break up with you cause you tell your parents then he isnt a good bf at all.and he just might be using you.
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I can't see what the problem is?:unsure:
  5. Mightbehere

    Mightbehere Well-Known Member

    or a sex offender....:dry:
  6. Alexpt2

    Alexpt2 Well-Known Member

    You're 16, he's 23,hmmmmmmmm

    If I were you I'd be keeping that on the DL. If you were to tell your parents they'd probably report him to the police. That is, they would if they had any common sense about them.
  7. physician

    physician Well-Known Member

    what the hell :huh::huh::huh:

    16-23 i see it perfectly normal....

    oh my God don't be afraid of nothing if u love him and if he loves u truly dont worry and tell it to ur parents they must accept it....if not try and try and try...

    thats the only way, u cant hide it forever :rolleyes:
  8. Alexpt2

    Alexpt2 Well-Known Member

    normal if he's a pedophile maybe :laugh::laugh::laugh:
  9. Mightbehere

    Mightbehere Well-Known Member

    Exactly! especially since he doesn't want you telling your parents...

    and seriously the mind of a 16 year old and a 23 year old guy arn't very compatible.
  10. helena

    helena Staff Alumni

    I think it all depends on several things: I am a mother of a 15 year old girl, and for a start I would like to meet the guy before I make objections, threathnings about police and stuff....I would like to have the chance to keep my daughter instead of without knowing any facts just go blindly by the law and loose all control;
    There are a lot of different 16 year old people and 23 year old, so compatability in minds isnt just a matter of calendar years.
    My first bf was 24 and I was 14 and believe me he was one of the most kind, gentle, understanding person I ever met and it wasnt him who I lost my virginity to, that was some 18 old boyfriend that kept insisting on it, 2, 3 years later.

    For a start, girls tend to be more mature.
    What indeed bothers me too is that he doesnt want you to tell your parents: to keep this things a secret doesnt seem safe to me and I advise you to try to change his mind, and if you decide to meet maybe you could bring a good friend along?
    I dont know how well you know eachother, but it seems more safe to me.
    Anyway, I'm all for open game with the parents, it works best for us:
    I hope my daughter keeps telling me what's going on in her life, bad or good, without beeing affraid to be reported to the police or some friend of hers:
    would you trust someone you know it could go and call the police on someone just because he's that old even if he haven't ever do or tried to do something illegal or wrong?
    like this I might get the chance to be there for her even after huge mistakes for instance, or help prevent some:
    So give things a good thought, with your mind, not with your heart in this:wink:
    Take care
  11. MourningAngel

    MourningAngel Well-Known Member

    i'm afraid i didn't make this completly clear he said he'd brake up if my parents say i'm not allowed to see him or when they're upset with him being 23. he wants me to tell them so that he can visit me.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 11, 2009
  12. helena

    helena Staff Alumni

    It's ok, good you clearified that....
    I guess I understand his point, as you both could get in a lot of trouble
    and that eventually could disturb your relationship at same point; and than to break up after all the fight and trouble you probably go through if your parents don't accept it....
    So what do you think the chances are of them to accept your choice, or at least to give the guy a chance?
    I hope it all work out for you, I reckon it's eating on you.
  13. stinkymouse

    stinkymouse Well-Known Member

    I was 25 when i was dating a 16 and a half year old gf..and i used to spend the weekend at her house,sleeping in her bed...we lasted 9 years together.
  14. levitated-one

    levitated-one Well-Known Member

    I'm sure if you make it clear to your parents that you've met a wonderful friend, and would like to introduce him to your parents. If you think your parents would disagree, use the word "friend". If they ask, just say he's a friend. Letting him meet your parents is important, as you are only 16 years of age, plus the age difference. But I'm sure he's a wonderful person, who needs to control his urge. Helping each other out is the key, as you are only 16, try not to be over committed with something that is not solid yet.

    I hope everything works well with you and him.
  15. Summer.Rain

    Summer.Rain Well-Known Member

    Edit: Nevermind thay deleted all the offending posts :X
  16. soliloquise

    soliloquise Well-Known Member

    16 is legal in the uk...
    and it depends on the maturity of both parties.
    BUT the fact that this guy does NOT want you to tell your folks makes me very wary and uncomfortable. maybe you should ask him why? secrets are rarely healthy
  17. helena

    helena Staff Alumni

    I thought the same too, about him not wanting the parents to know.
    It was a misunderstanding:wink:
  18. soliloquise

    soliloquise Well-Known Member

    ah sorry if i misunderstood... it is late and have no brain :D
  19. Rockstar808

    Rockstar808 Member

    I don't support this.
  20. levitated-one

    levitated-one Well-Known Member

    Tell me why you don't. mod edit >helena<
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 12, 2009