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my partner committed suicide on 6th feb
- Thread starter julie1965
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Im not going to insult you by saying i can understand the degree of pain and loss you are feeling right now because im not in your situation. All i know is your emotions must be crazy and for that i must apologise, no one should go through what you are :hug:
But it was not your fault. Not at all. Unfortunately im suicidal myself and one thing that you can always be sure of is when someone ends their life its for them. The resposibility lies with them. People around them can only do SO much to help. The rest is up to the person.
I really hope you have lots of support yourself to help you through this tragic time.
My thoughts are with you x
But it was not your fault. Not at all. Unfortunately im suicidal myself and one thing that you can always be sure of is when someone ends their life its for them. The resposibility lies with them. People around them can only do SO much to help. The rest is up to the person.
I really hope you have lots of support yourself to help you through this tragic time.
My thoughts are with you x
Im with Tappa, although Ive never suffered a loss to this affect, I have been depressed and suicidial as far back as I can remember, and most times Im living for others, and sometimes the pain is to much that I feel like I cant go on for anyone. Dont blame yourself, it rarely has anything to do with others, its whats on the inside of the one suffering.
Im so sorry your going through this, my thoughts are with you and family.
Im so sorry your going through this, my thoughts are with you and family.
I hope you have got some support for you some grief councilling when your ready I have lost someone and i know the pain is so deep but i too have learned and know that it was nothing you did It was the sadness it was his illness that too him away and nothing anyone could have done in that time really. It may not have even been his choice in the end it was his sadness okay his pain overtook all rationality and took him away.
Please keep reaching out for help for you now I am so sorry for your loss
Please keep reaching out for help for you now I am so sorry for your loss
Your partner is OK. We all lose loved ones. I've lost many.
It's especially difficult to lose someone this way. I believe
the essential fact is that however they are lost, you must
know they are OK. You are the person in pain, they are not.
I've lost enough people to dread the feeling of shock and disbelief.
I sympathize with how much it hurts. I believe we never get
over these things. We get through them. Life is a journey
with a beginning and an end. Now you need to take care of
yourself. Do what is right for you. Try not to feel sorry for
yourself, or to carry guilt. Neither serves us well.
Roy
It's especially difficult to lose someone this way. I believe
the essential fact is that however they are lost, you must
know they are OK. You are the person in pain, they are not.
I've lost enough people to dread the feeling of shock and disbelief.
I sympathize with how much it hurts. I believe we never get
over these things. We get through them. Life is a journey
with a beginning and an end. Now you need to take care of
yourself. Do what is right for you. Try not to feel sorry for
yourself, or to carry guilt. Neither serves us well.
Roy
don't think it to be ur fault.each n everone of us suffers loss - whether by natural death,suicide ,murder.
Its absolutely not your fault and neither is his.
I can feel for the loss(hell i myself have suffered several losses) .Again dont blame yorself we are here to help you overcome ur grief.Feel free to pm me anytime.
I can understand what u r going through.You r probably blaming yourself for the loss of ur dear one.Try to forget about the past and look towards the future.
Its absolutely not your fault and neither is his.
I can feel for the loss(hell i myself have suffered several losses) .Again dont blame yorself we are here to help you overcome ur grief.Feel free to pm me anytime.
I can understand what u r going through.You r probably blaming yourself for the loss of ur dear one.Try to forget about the past and look towards the future.
I agree with the other posts. It is not your fault. When a person is suffering suicidal feelings, thoughts and urges, they really arent the person you know and love at that point. They need answers to whatever is troubling them and at that moment in time they completely believe that is the only answer or solution. I know that is what I am feeling each time I have attempted. I dont think of others or even myself then.
You cannot accept the responsibility that this carries. Because it is not yours to carry. I know there are no words that are going to be posted here that is going to make it all better and heal all that hurts. Atleast not right now. But please believe the words we are all offering. And once you have had a chance to grieve these words will have more meaning. Please hun keep posting and get it out. Dont let suicide and the depression that follows take another person down. Let us help get you through this :arms:
You cannot accept the responsibility that this carries. Because it is not yours to carry. I know there are no words that are going to be posted here that is going to make it all better and heal all that hurts. Atleast not right now. But please believe the words we are all offering. And once you have had a chance to grieve these words will have more meaning. Please hun keep posting and get it out. Dont let suicide and the depression that follows take another person down. Let us help get you through this :arms:
my heart aches for you...I'm so sorry for your loss..
what you are feeling is 'normal' in grief after suicide...it's not your fault..
there will be many emotions to deal with and guilt and blame are some..
therapy is a good idea...support groups, reading lots of books on grief helped me...( i lost a child to suicide)
here if you ever need to talk..
*
what you are feeling is 'normal' in grief after suicide...it's not your fault..
there will be many emotions to deal with and guilt and blame are some..
therapy is a good idea...support groups, reading lots of books on grief helped me...( i lost a child to suicide)
here if you ever need to talk..
*People don't take their own lives because they don't love their family or their friends or their partners--they do it because they hurt so bad. Sometimes there is some form of mental illness but not always. They're not thinking clearly when they do it but it does not mean they're bipolar or schizophrenic or any other mental illness. I'd think depression almost always plays a part. Just know they're at peace and that it's not your fault. I am very sorry for your loss.
He didn't do it to cripple you or hurt you. He was simply in a great deal of pain and had resigned himself to at least the belief that it was more than he could bear.
He didn't do it to cripple you or hurt you. He was simply in a great deal of pain and had resigned himself to at least the belief that it was more than he could bear.
ty you all for all the support. at this moment i dont really know what im gonna do, we had an argument, i left, went to my daughters for a while, i was still in contact with my darling, returnedd home to get a few things, and there i found him, his family kicked me out of our home because it was rented off his sister and they all balme me
I'm sorry about your loss and the situation you are in.
As the others are saying, it's not your fault. Even if you had an argument and perhaps, said some nasty things to eachother - it's not your fault. Don't blame yourself.
Having these suicidal feelings myself (and I know this is the way I will eventually leave), I can assure you that most suicides really don't blame others for their bad luck in life. Most actually blame themselves if they want to put a 'face' on the reason why they can't go on any longer.
His family is grieving and they probably want to understand why. But the catch is - they probably never will. So their grief and pain turns into anger instead and is directed towards you because.... well, you are there and an easy target because of bla bla...
I hope you figure out a way to go on.
As the others are saying, it's not your fault. Even if you had an argument and perhaps, said some nasty things to eachother - it's not your fault. Don't blame yourself.
Having these suicidal feelings myself (and I know this is the way I will eventually leave), I can assure you that most suicides really don't blame others for their bad luck in life. Most actually blame themselves if they want to put a 'face' on the reason why they can't go on any longer.
His family is grieving and they probably want to understand why. But the catch is - they probably never will. So their grief and pain turns into anger instead and is directed towards you because.... well, you are there and an easy target because of bla bla...
I hope you figure out a way to go on.
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