Hello dear forum. My name is Dan. I am 22 years old, medically discharged from the military (not at all in any good way, though! Entry level separation due to prolonged panic attacks and health issues that I did not inform my recruiter about.), never held a job in my life and I can't help but feel as though my world is caving in because I'm shut up in my little room all day without any way to leave it, physically, sure, I could leave it. I could leave it and walk down the street, but mentally I'm stuck here in front of my computer forever. I feel fear and I feel shame, I can't find a job because I cannot even leave my room half the time. My sleeping habits are completely turned around and I haven't taken a shower in five days, I feel like a mess and sometimes I wonder if it would be better if I ended it all, I think everybody thinks that at one time or another, but I've literally done nothing with my life other than sit on my butt playing video games, learning how to play the bass and guitar (without being in a band or doing anything with that knowledge) while taking medication for depression and panic disorders during my entire teenage years 'till my insurance ran out. I tried to get into college, but I lacked the disipline to even make it through a semester. Homework? Nope. Not doing it, I'm heading out to the bar or to go see a show with friends to make my life a little less alone. A job? I've got no work experience. I can't even get into a fast food place to flip burgers because they don't even look at my application. I've got no experience, I've got no references that aren't either family or close friends who have absolutely nothing to do with the job I'm applying for. I don't know what to do. I feel trapped, I feel afraid. I don't want to hurt myself, but I am getting to the point that a mixture of fear and feelings of worthlessness are starting to wear on me. I feel worthless because I've never done any of the things that are normal for somebody in his late-teens early-twenties does. I don't have a car, I'm still living with my grandparents, no job, no nothing. I feel worthless and afraid and I don't know how the hell I can deal with it, and every day feels closer to me doing something that I know I'd regret.