So thanks to my annoying friends reminding me I had a relationship with a female I actually thought about it for the first time in years. Since then for some reason it has eaten at the back of my mind. So I guess I just need to write out some thoughts to finally get it out fo my life so I can slowly age in peace.
It was a little over a decade ago that this relationship came to an end. I have not had any new ones since, which I am proud of. I met her on a forum, a rare meeting where you meet someone who happens to live near you. I chose to ignore my instincts. I was raised around females, my mom and two sisters, I know that there was nothing to be gained from actually seeing this female in person. Yet for some reason I chose to ignore the red flag. The only good thing that came out of this was my confirmation of what I already knew. Casual, non-professional, in person, physical relationships with females are worthless. I guess since I had one I can officially say that. Back then it was all theory based on observation not actual experience. So to her I say congratulations I am doing everything in my power to forget you ever existed, like you wanted. Hell even my father and brothers think I have never had a female in my life. I will keep up the lie because their shocked faces are just hilarious. I can think back and see that our relationship was a net negative to my life.
I think back and realize how much time she spent trying to convince me to abuse her, emotionally and/or physically. She would regularly ask what it would take for me to get angry enough to hit her. She would often times tell me to not waste my time with the pretense of hanging out. To just call her up and tell her to come over and have sex with me. Thinking back right around the time she left she was spending time with another guy who would leave her in tears after every phone call she fielded at my place. Guess I know why she left right?
so in the off event that she sees this post I want her to know that I just thinking about her makes me do everything in my power to make females hate me. Not that I have to try to hard. I have yet to meet another female who was as desperate for a relationship as her. I am talking avoiding extinction levels of desperation. Even if I did meet another female like her I would keep her at text length as simply typing is too much work let alone actually speaking. I think if I stay this fat no one will ever want me. I think if I do not comb my hair people will leave me alone. I think if I do not shower females will be repulsed. Thanks to her I can quietly die alone. So I am grateful I really am. If I could go back in time and change things that would be my first stop. I would have never even replied to her PM. Thankfully I am an ugly, fat, loser Just being seen is enough to keep such things away from me. I will never have another relationship and I will die alone. So my sole regret is letting her convince me that a relationship might be worth it.
It was a little over a decade ago that this relationship came to an end. I have not had any new ones since, which I am proud of. I met her on a forum, a rare meeting where you meet someone who happens to live near you. I chose to ignore my instincts. I was raised around females, my mom and two sisters, I know that there was nothing to be gained from actually seeing this female in person. Yet for some reason I chose to ignore the red flag. The only good thing that came out of this was my confirmation of what I already knew. Casual, non-professional, in person, physical relationships with females are worthless. I guess since I had one I can officially say that. Back then it was all theory based on observation not actual experience. So to her I say congratulations I am doing everything in my power to forget you ever existed, like you wanted. Hell even my father and brothers think I have never had a female in my life. I will keep up the lie because their shocked faces are just hilarious. I can think back and see that our relationship was a net negative to my life.
I think back and realize how much time she spent trying to convince me to abuse her, emotionally and/or physically. She would regularly ask what it would take for me to get angry enough to hit her. She would often times tell me to not waste my time with the pretense of hanging out. To just call her up and tell her to come over and have sex with me. Thinking back right around the time she left she was spending time with another guy who would leave her in tears after every phone call she fielded at my place. Guess I know why she left right?
so in the off event that she sees this post I want her to know that I just thinking about her makes me do everything in my power to make females hate me. Not that I have to try to hard. I have yet to meet another female who was as desperate for a relationship as her. I am talking avoiding extinction levels of desperation. Even if I did meet another female like her I would keep her at text length as simply typing is too much work let alone actually speaking. I think if I stay this fat no one will ever want me. I think if I do not comb my hair people will leave me alone. I think if I do not shower females will be repulsed. Thanks to her I can quietly die alone. So I am grateful I really am. If I could go back in time and change things that would be my first stop. I would have never even replied to her PM. Thankfully I am an ugly, fat, loser Just being seen is enough to keep such things away from me. I will never have another relationship and I will die alone. So my sole regret is letting her convince me that a relationship might be worth it.
