If I remove all traces of my exsistence from my room and the house, it'll be easier on them. No shity photos to remind them of their failure fucked up duaghter. It takest ime to remove all traces of me but in the end it'll be easier for them. They wont remember me as much. I dont want to be remembered at all. Hell I don't even want a grave. I want to be cremated and thrown away into the rain. No memories, easier healing time
What if this was a period of time that you were supposed to live through so you could know the horror of feeling like this. So you could then help kids when you grow up. Become a person who can help kids who need help. Because you knew first hand what it felt like to be so bullied and abused? The best people to help kids who are being hurt, are adults who were there themselves. maybe this hell you are going through is to prepare you to help other people who have decided they are worthless etc. And believe me, there are millions and millions in that club. Amazing kids who have been convinced of lies. When you graduate from school study to become someone who can help kids. Who better can help kids who are being bullied and abused and want to die? Someone who knows what it felt like. The world does need for you to stay here.