My story

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by forgotten1591, Oct 21, 2009.

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  1. forgotten1591

    forgotten1591 Member

    I joined sf a while back, when I first felt very depress, now i come back for the same reason.

    About a month ago me and my ex girlfriend of 4 year decided to break up, its a choice i regret now, i kept her on facebook as a friend for about 2 weeks and saw how much happier she was without me, how much better off she is hurt way too much to keep her as a friend.

    During our relationship I chose to abandon most of my friends for her now there's only 2 that still talk to me and are there for me but now one of them is leaving for 5 months. The other one has a child of her own and tries to be there for me as much as she can but she's in the middle of a divorce and with a child can't always be there.

    I feel so alone and i know this forum has helped alot of people so I'm hoping it can help me.
     
  2. Tobes

    Tobes Well-Known Member

    It will. Hopefully it will take away your loneliness, because you see there are many people that feel as alone and depressed as you do, and you may make some friends here in the process. There are good people here that will listen to all you have to say, and still ask to hear more. Keep posting, it'll do you good.
     
  3. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

  4. forgotten1591

    forgotten1591 Member

    Last night I had a dream about her, We were still together but still having the same problems we had for alot of the relationship. This morning I found a pair a pjs she used to wear when she slept over. The rest of the day I spent in a dace. It feels like things aren't goona get better :(
     
  5. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    It's normal to feel that way when you break up with someone or just leave them.
    It took me a good year to get over my fiance'..She was unfaithfull, an alcoholic, and ripped me off for $18,000 but my love for her saw past all that.. Once we split up I went thru the greif stage and then the anger stage came into the picture.. I know this doesn't have anything to do with what your feeling but just wanted to show you that you will get past this...It takes time to heal a broken heart..Take Care!!
     
  6. forgotten1591

    forgotten1591 Member

    Thanks. It still thing are still wierd I don't know if I miss her or I miss being with someone, a couple of people have said to just have a one night stand, that it will make me feel better, but I dought it. I think I want a to start a new relationship but i'm not so sure if thats what I need right now : /
     
  7. chooselife

    chooselife Well-Known Member

    Yes heartbreak truly sucks doesn't it? It is one of the most painful experiences we go through. You feel as though your heart has been ripped out, stomped on, then sucked back into the pit of your stomach where it stagnates into a hefty cramp. Our whole world has come to an end, and we are left with this gaping void. But you know what, you get over it. I had my heart broken three times, and it was hell each time. Now, I am with my soulmate. The best thing that ever happened to me, who I would not have met had I of still been with my ex of course. Thank God, because this relationship is so much more healthy.

    As for a one night stand, that's your decision. A new relationship seems kinda too soon since you are still grieving. Do you think it would be very fair to a new partner since you are still pinning for your ex?

    Your heart will heal in time. In the meantime maybe you can find distractions like meeting new friends to hang out with, or a new hobby. Something to stimulate your mind and take you out of your current mindset. I know that extremely hard, but it's an idea. May help a bit. Just stay strong. :smile:
     
  8. princewacky

    princewacky Member

    i totally agree with chooselife.. time will heal.. well, ived been with the same situation as yours.. i know it does hurts alot... but duh!? life has so much to offer! just remind yourself.... there's always a rainbow after the rain!... ;) move on. ;) :donut:
     
  9. JM18

    JM18 Active Member

    Oh my dear lord...

    I dare say that you guys make me sick... those of you who come to a suicide forum because your gf/bf left you.

    Seriously! Haven't you ever heard the saying " It's better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all? "

    Now take that saying into consideration... and know that there are people out there who are amongst a ton of people, yet lonely as fuck... and i mean seriously lonely... if i was a chick (as the society doesn't approve of men crying, therefore i'm not used to it) i'd cry my eyes out on a daily basis.

    Take it like this, somebody loved you... this means that somebody found you worth being loved. This also means that you have a chance of finding love again. But think of those poor souls who haven't found love... who think day after day: " Am i that ugly/stupid/fat/incapable of discussion (etc.) that noone loves me? "

    Think of those poor bastards... oh and i bet you also know that everyone prefers their partner to be confident... well how exactly can a person like that be confident if he/she gets no reassurance of his/her looks.

    So after this long gay banter, think for a moment... YOU HAVE BEEN LOVED! YOU WILL BE LOVED AGAIN! BUT THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO HAVEN'T BEEN LOVED YET, AND WHO ARE NOT GETTING ANY YOUNGER AND FOR WHO THE SITUATION IS GETTING WORSE!

    You may take this as an insult, or i dunno, whatever you want to take this... but before starting to think in your head sentences starting with " How dare he... " THINK FOR 2 SECONDS about what i wrote here.
     
  10. forgotten1591

    forgotten1591 Member

    I don't take it as an insult and I understand what your are trying to say. I still can't help to feel the way I do. Idk I guess I'm being selfish?
     
  11. twistedwhispers

    twistedwhispers Member & Antiquities Friend

    I don't feel you are being selfish. Not at all. Everyone's pain is different. Everyone's reasons for wanting to end it are different. People may not agree. They don't have to.

    I am so sorry you are going through what you are. Try to hold on. When you feeling like giving up, try to find a small bit of hope, deep inside, that things can turn around. It's not easy but is possible. I do it every day.

    Take care. pm me if you ever want to talk or vent or whatever.:hug:
     
  12. forgotten1591

    forgotten1591 Member

    Thanks lostlilgirl,

    Right now I'm just been keeping busy. I asked my boss for more hours and at home I've been watching alot of movies and doing school work. It seems to be helping I've been too tired to think about much else
     
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