well just ate out with my mom.sis. and her b/f.... was pointless for me to fucking be there... i didn't say anything and they didn't even notice i was really there so i just ate and kept quiet...
I dont know why the hell i dont fucking kill myself right now they wont notice and if they do they wont give a shit... only thing they would care about is who gets what (sterio...tv...etc...) fucking hate my family... hate my life... hate my "friends". I hate how i look i hate that i fail at everything i do... and dont tell me to "think positive and you will do better" I cant fucking think positive everything around me is crap so there is no way of me to actually think positive about anything!
Fuck trying to get better things only get worse for me... i really dont think my mom has that much long to live... would be shocked if she made it to my next b-day :sad: see all i can think about is negative shit... i hate my b-day anyways i dont do anything on them.... fuck i shouldn't even be posting this crap for yall to have to read this shit about some fucked up kid that you really dont give a crap about.... bleh im in a shitty mood... feel like cutting myself to calm down... all ready have i did before i went out to dinner and now i really want to do it again except worse this time.... i just want to make it so i pass out due to the loss of blood... haha im fucked up.... :dry:
I dont know why the hell i dont fucking kill myself right now they wont notice and if they do they wont give a shit... only thing they would care about is who gets what (sterio...tv...etc...) fucking hate my family... hate my life... hate my "friends". I hate how i look i hate that i fail at everything i do... and dont tell me to "think positive and you will do better" I cant fucking think positive everything around me is crap so there is no way of me to actually think positive about anything!
Fuck trying to get better things only get worse for me... i really dont think my mom has that much long to live... would be shocked if she made it to my next b-day :sad: see all i can think about is negative shit... i hate my b-day anyways i dont do anything on them.... fuck i shouldn't even be posting this crap for yall to have to read this shit about some fucked up kid that you really dont give a crap about.... bleh im in a shitty mood... feel like cutting myself to calm down... all ready have i did before i went out to dinner and now i really want to do it again except worse this time.... i just want to make it so i pass out due to the loss of blood... haha im fucked up.... :dry: