My time

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Stick, May 22, 2008.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Stick

    Stick Member

    I have had plans for the past few months on when I would end my life. Just needed a little bit more time to get things in order. Today I went to go to work, and my car is dead......Maybe a sign my time is here......I just needed a little more time to save up enough money to give to my daughter. She hates me, and hasn't spoken to me in 5 yrs, but I wanted to leave her and her children some $$$... I guess she won't get as much as I had wanted to give.

    I hate life. I hate me. I hate the world. I want to die. I want the emotional pain to stop.
  2. Jenny

    Jenny Staff Alumni

    Hi Stick,

    I'm sorry that you're in so much pain right now. It does sound incredibly painful for you.. so much so that the only way you can think of making the pain stop is for you to take your own life. Is there anyone you could talk to about the way that you're feeling right now? A friend, doctor, therapist? I hope you will continue talking here if it helps too..

    I hope that you are able to get your car sorted out. Maybe it breaking down was not a sign that you should leave, but a sign that your work in life is not finished yet. You can fix your car and in time things can get better. Can I ask whether anything has happened in the last few months that has triggered these suicidal thoughts? You don't have to say if you don't want to, but I wonder if there is a trigger, and whether it would help to talk about it with someone professional? Or here? Or both? :)

    Keep reaching out.. you're not alone
    Jenny x
  3. Stick

    Stick Member

    I feel like crawling into the backseat f my car, taking an over dose and going to sleep. I just have no fight left in me at all.

    I don't have anyone left in my life. I want to die, and probably will.
  4. Jenny

    Jenny Staff Alumni

    Sounds like a really lonely place for you at the moment. A time when all your energy and fight seems to have been drained away. There is help out there though Stick.. do you have a good doctor? Maybe he/she will be able to prescribe you something and/or refer you on to someone who could help?

    I'm here and listening xxx
  5. Stick

    Stick Member


    If I call they will section me. i don't want the ward, I want to die. I also want to see my daughter, and grandkids. But she hates me. She hasn't spoken to me in 5 yrs.
  6. Jenny

    Jenny Staff Alumni

    Oh i'm sorry to hear about not having contact with your daughter for such a long time, that must be very difficult for you (both). Is your daughter aware that you would like to see her and your grandchildren? It this a possibility at all? I don't know what happened between you both in the past, but maybe she could see past it now and allow you to see your grandkids, and also allow her children to have a grandma/nan... I hope you'll look after yourself tonight and not hurt yourself xx
  7. Stick

    Stick Member

    Thanks...I think the car is calling me. I know it is. I am going to do this tonight.

  8. Jenny

    Jenny Staff Alumni

    :sad: I hope you were able to keep yourself safe Stick. I have been thinking about you xxxx
  9. Stick

    Stick Member

    Didn't do it last night, but still wanting to today. I am such a fucking waste of life. I fuck up everything.
  10. Gunner12

    Gunner12 Well-Known Member

    The future is still changeable.

    The past is the past and it can't be changed, but the future is a different story.
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.