My way of letting it all out... "Abduction of Self-Worth"

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Nuri, Mar 17, 2007.

  1. Nuri

    Nuri Well-Known Member

    Heres my method of letting it all... I write songs... It's not finished but I had to stop before I overloaded...

    Abduction of Self-Worth

    Chorus

    16 to 23 years old… so cold
    The sons you never wanted
    Failures, the both of us… in your thoughts
    Sorry we couldn’t be the perfect children
    Found in your dreams of the future
    I guess you’re stuck with us
    The sons you never wanted

    Verse 1

    When I was born, you were torn
    “Not another mouth to feed…”
    In your thoughts
    I wasn’t worth the seeds
    Of which I was formed from
    My brother watched my mother bleed
    For what? I never made the grades
    That you made for the both of us

    Verse 2

    As I grew up, I was through
    With life and all it’s games
    I’ve seen my stars fall down
    From high up in the sky
    Friends have left and friends have died
    Right in front of my eyes
    The ones I always wanted
    Jack and Jill the departed

    Chorus

    16 to 23 years old… so cold
    The sons you never wanted
    Failures, the both of us… in your thoughts
    Sorry we couldn’t be the perfect children
    Found in your dreams of the future
    I guess you’re stuck with us
    The sons you never wanted

    Verse 3

    You say that you’re proud of us
    I’ve never heard so many lies
    Drunken fools have beaten me,
    Cheated me and left my soul to burn
    Of course they tried to lie so I couldn’t fly
    In turn we let you down… everyday we frown
    Time and time again you use your tools
    I’m left feeling so small that I used to be tall...

    Verse 4

    I’ve never tried to hold my head up high
    To what I’m supposedly worth
    My mother and me are manic-depressives
    We’ve never been sane enough to take the blame
    My brother he’s a drug addict...
    Cannabis is his gateway out of here
    From the fears of the real world
    Cocaine, any other drug you can name
    He’s tried them all… aren’t you to blame?

    Chorus

    16 to 23 years old… so cold
    The sons you never wanted
    Failures, the both of us… in your thoughts
    Sorry we couldn’t be the perfect children
    Found in your dreams of the future
    I guess you’re stuck with us
    The sons you never wanted

    Verse 5

    When I was gaining education for the sake of your nation
    Crawling down the hall of your chosen school
    Became part of my daily routine
    From what it seemed… I always was the one to fall
    Abused, used, you name it… I’ve witnessed them all
    I’ve never told a never soul
    While cowering in my hole
    Wasn’t that the way to ‘play ball?’

    Verse 6

    My mother she was never the brightest spark
    Yet she never really did have the best start
    Her father was in the RAF, strafing from station to station
    Nation to nation... She never had a chance to have the best education
    When she settled down in ‘merry (c)old’ England
    She got herself pregnant, when was 16
    You could say she was living the dream
    Until she gave birth, my half-sister was given away
    There was nothing my mother could say…

    Chorus

    16 to 23 years old… so cold
    The sons you never wanted
    Failures, the both of us… in your thoughts
    Sorry we couldn’t be the perfect children
    Found in your dreams of the future
    I guess you’re stuck with us
    The sons you never wanted

    Verse 7

    Father, I’ve seen my head forced close to a brick wall
    I’ve seen knives come and go like prowling meerkats
    Searching for a mate on this very date
    Leaving nothing but a flood of blood
    Beneath my big old feet...
    I could never ‘fill’ my Size 11 shoes
    No matter which ones I chose
    I suppose I was empty from the day I was formed

    Verse 8

    People always used to hate me
    They were never alone
    After all, it’s fate… Something we all hate
    As we await our destiny
    Karma, Karma, I guess you could say
    I get punished for being born
    With numerous thorns…
    I am no perfect Rose, I’ll admit
    For the most, I’ve hit the nail right on target
    Of failure

    I'm going out now... I'll finish it when I get back... This is song comes right from the bottom of my soul...
     
  2. Nuri

    Nuri Well-Known Member

    Chorus

    16 and 23 years old… so cold
    The two sons you never wanted
    Failures, the both of us… in your thoughts
    Sorry we couldn’t be the perfect children
    Found in your dreams of the future
    I guess you’re stuck with us
    The two sons you never wanted

    Verse 9

    Inside myself I hide
    Till the day that I find
    A better part of me
    Oberserving on the outside
    Motionless, Emotionless but
    Not devotionless... I'm worthless
    Yes, Father, I wanted to die...
    I died when I was 8
    When my self-worth was stolen and
    My pride was ripped from me...
    Not that I ever had any
    Couldn't you tell? Or were you so binded by money?
    You know whats funny?
    I heard you mention the words 'bank-rupt' today
    What a suprise... No money...
    I lost my money when I died inside
    I'm bank-rupt, father, not you.

    Verse 10

    I've never heard my songs of praise
    Hell, no ones written a song about me
    Especially not a positive one
    I awaited my praise from you day after day, Father
    They never arrived... whole heartedly...
    I still await them, dear Dad...
    They never arrive... not a single letter...
    I break things, father... glasses, everything...
    You lecture the hell out of me... I'm human...
    Humans make mistakes...

    Chorus

    16 and 23 years old… so cold
    The two sons you never wanted
    Failures, the both of us… in your thoughts
    Sorry we couldn’t be the perfect children
    Found in your dreams of the future
    I guess you’re stuck with us
    The two sons you never wanted

    Verse 11

    I'm in love, father... I'm bi-sexual...
    I'm head over heals for
    The most amazing person that
    Has ever stepped foot on this tainted planet
    She's from America, dear dad...
    Whats that you say, Father? Money?
    I'll sort that out... I'll do what ever it takes...
    She's worth every effort... every penny...

    To be continued...
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 17, 2007
  3. The_Discarded

    The_Discarded Staff Alumni

    Awww, Callum. :hug:

    It's very sad and genuine, yet pretty.

    :hug: Hope 'letting it all out' has made you feel better.