Sending you best wishes
I hope you can do it without a lawyer, but if you need to get one it's better than losing everything. I agree with Walker - do not leave your home. It should be your wife searching for apartments, as she is initiating the divorce!
I really feel for you - how long have you been the only breadwinner in your marriage? It's a cruel irony that someone who has supported their spouse financially can be forced to continue even if the spouse initiates a divorce. Do you own your house? If so, could you both sell the house and have each of you purchase a strata apartment? In my city apartments cost much less than houses. There is also seniors' housing (both owned and rental), government subsidized housing and co-ops. In my view, owning one's residence is so important in one's older years as rents can keep increasing unless you are lucky enough to get into deeply subsidized housing.
Your wife may have Lupus but it sounds like she is the one calling the shots and you need to make sure you stand up for yourself and your future. You are entitled to at least 50% of your assets. Do not let her make you afraid to go home at night.
My sister-in-law and her husband separated their house into a duplex and each live in one side. Of course they are amicable in order to have done this. I'm just saying there are options.