Narcissistic Abuse
- Thread starter Cursed712
- Start date
- Tags emotional abuse psychological abuse
The seering rotting gnawing and eating me alive pain and torment every second of everyday for years now she causes me has got to fucking go. I CANT TAKE ANYMORE. HOW DO U BEAR THE UNBEARABLE THAT NEVER LESSENS OR GOES AWAY AND ONLY GETS WORSE WITH TIME AS THE COVERT ABUSE GRADUALLY ALWAYS WORSENS. I NEED AN ESCAPE. I NEED A REAL WAY OUT AND REAL LASTING RELIEF. TAKE MY HEART AND CHILDREN OUT OF THIS DEMON PERSONS HANDS PLEASE GOD.
I am so sorry you are having to go through this, the pain never will go away, not completely, it will eventually lesson, it's like i have developed a callous to it, but this has taken some time. I know what you are going through, when it comes to your kids, my oldest dad is also a narc and made life hell fighting me for custody, at one point my precious baby girl told me it was like "dad has one arm, and you have the other and you are both pulling me apart" that was the breaking point for me. So maybe our situations are different but the pain, man I feel you on that one. Just try and have a little hope, one day your kids will see her for who she is, and they are going to need you. They need you now, they need you to be the voice of reason and logic, they need you to be a safe space for them, they need you to just show up and love them to the very best of your abilities. Even if its hard for you to see them now, they still need you. This is how I bear the pain, by holding to one day my daughter will see her dad for what he is and come home.
your moms a narc. Theyre evil sick people that destroy other people anyone near them even their own kids. Theyre incapable of real love to anyone. Thats the truth unfortunately and im still trying to wrap my head around it for years now cause its not natural but its the truth. Look for it you will see its true. The world is full of these people so use ur mom as practice because yes it sucks to have a parent as a narc im sure but being duped into falling in love with one and having kids with it is worse than death. Use ur mom as practice on how to spot a narc cause they are everywhere.
Just coming across this thread now and I do feel I can relate.
I am a victim! but I also always feel like I'm not. a support thread sounds great, but maybe I'd have to mostly just listen.
then I read the next reply and suddenly
my father was pretty much mild mannered yet he always boasted how he and my mother had the perfect marriage and the best. but there was other stuff that made that claim show as being fake. how could a child - and there were a bunch of us - ever hope to achieve anything similar in marriage and I always felt - from age 18 or so that this must have been so hurtful to my mom no matter how much she didn't let on to anything. yet all us siblings did not do well in marriage. not that marriage was stormy but more, just not really happy and in my case, I found marriage mainly to br as a futile refuge from my own self inflicted damage. where did that come from? my siblings mostly do not elaborate much except for a few similar observations we've made about growing up with a narcissistic father.
then I read the next reply and suddenly
my father was pretty much mild mannered yet he always boasted how he and my mother had the perfect marriage and the best. but there was other stuff that made that claim show as being fake. how could a child - and there were a bunch of us - ever hope to achieve anything similar in marriage and I always felt - from age 18 or so that this must have been so hurtful to my mom no matter how much she didn't let on to anything. yet all us siblings did not do well in marriage. not that marriage was stormy but more, just not really happy and in my case, I found marriage mainly to br as a futile refuge from my own self inflicted damage. where did that come from? my siblings mostly do not elaborate much except for a few similar observations we've made about growing up with a narcissistic father.
I think we tend to stick to what we know as normal, how could we not if thats all we are exposed to? I stayed in abusive relationships because its what I knew, I felt all families were like that and anything else was fake or t.v. My teen is dead set against marriage, he feels the family line should end, all I can do here is impress on him that it is possible to have healthy loving relationships, not everyone is an abuser. I don't know, I think its possible, maybe not for me or anything, but definatley for others.
My mom, My stepdad, my uncle, My brother, My ex and my current partner.
🤦♀️ what the hell is wrong with me. Sometimes I think I just look for abuse.
My mom and dad have been dead awhile now and I quit talking to my family 15 years ago. My stepdad .. I hope he rots in hell as well as the rest of them. My sisters every once in a blue moon do we speak. It’s ysually when they need something from me.
Had a few bosses like that too . Yell and scream at me all day everything I’m doing wrong . Literally yell at me . Then come clock out time tell me what a great job I did and so happy I’m there and even at times take all ya employees out for dinner. (Small furniture shop not that many workers) everyday was that way.
🤦♀️ what the hell is wrong with me. Sometimes I think I just look for abuse.
My mom and dad have been dead awhile now and I quit talking to my family 15 years ago. My stepdad .. I hope he rots in hell as well as the rest of them. My sisters every once in a blue moon do we speak. It’s ysually when they need something from me.
Had a few bosses like that too . Yell and scream at me all day everything I’m doing wrong . Literally yell at me . Then come clock out time tell me what a great job I did and so happy I’m there and even at times take all ya employees out for dinner. (Small furniture shop not that many workers) everyday was that way.
Yep. My brother, my parent, my uncle , and psycho cousins are all narcs. I've lived with them all. I don't know who I am anymore. Been raped. But it doesn't matter. Been emotionally abused but it don't matter either.been physically abused..this too shall never matter. And even verbally abused but hey that's ok because it was done to me.
Carry on now, we all know that like trash I do not matter either.
Bye world. It's my time to go
Carry on now, we all know that like trash I do not matter either.
Bye world. It's my time to go
@Suicide Goddess You do matter. What else would matter is if you choose to defy the bad ones, that you showed the world that despite all that horror you and life are holding together.
I'm finally acknowledging that I have been a victim of a narcissist. Again. Crazy how you can walk right into the same disaster thinking it is a different case.
I finally came forward with the stories of my husband's abuse and found out very quickly that no one was surprised, but they didn't speak up because I always justified his actions. Most of our mutual friends were actually just there for me.
I feel so mind fucked. My mom told me it took her 5 years after divorcing my father to feel like the brain fog started to clear. I've gotten used to feeling confused, disoriented and forgetful. Unsure of myself. I bounced EVERYTHING off him and now I feel so alone and so ridiculous for feeling like I can't figure things out myself.
I saw a post today that said, "There is a future version of yourself who is glad you were strong enough." Time can't pass quickly enough right now.
I finally came forward with the stories of my husband's abuse and found out very quickly that no one was surprised, but they didn't speak up because I always justified his actions. Most of our mutual friends were actually just there for me.
I feel so mind fucked. My mom told me it took her 5 years after divorcing my father to feel like the brain fog started to clear. I've gotten used to feeling confused, disoriented and forgetful. Unsure of myself. I bounced EVERYTHING off him and now I feel so alone and so ridiculous for feeling like I can't figure things out myself.
I saw a post today that said, "There is a future version of yourself who is glad you were strong enough." Time can't pass quickly enough right now.