Need a little help

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by RESTurtles, Jun 24, 2014.

  1. RESTurtles

    RESTurtles Well-Known Member

    So about a two months ago i was asked out by a co worker to go out to a party, we drank, blah. Well got to her place and she asked me to come in, i never did this before, i was alone both emotionally and physically alone. She is around 20 years older than me, and shes my first. I told her and she thought she was ruining my life not letting me live life with young folks. But people like her dont come around often, so i told her i love her, plenty of times, she tells me sometimes, i usually say it first. Same thing with kissing, i have to kiss first, ive asked her and she said she doesnt like to say it alot. She says when she wants something, she gets it herself, so when i try to use her logic, it always seems to be a bad time. When i asked why, i find myself arguing with her, she seems to be set on shes right about alot. No saying sorrys after an argument, not saying she was wrong, but when shes wrong id like to see some sorta "im sorry" moment.

    Ive alwaye told her i love her, sometimes she says it back. I guess id like to be chased not the person chasing..

    Whats the thing to do or say, not trying to get in her pants, just want to feel loved.
  2. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    Pgrhaps she has a fear of you running off with someone younger, not saying that is the case but in relationships we all want to feel loved we all want to feel validated and we all have these horrible insecurities. Love brings out the best and worse in us, honestly just sit down have a chat reassure her that you love her, then explain how you feel. If you want a future expression this, see if you are both on the same page.
  3. RESTurtles

    RESTurtles Well-Known Member

    When i try to talk she complains im acting like a girl.... telling my true feelings, being honest, she tells me to shut up, and be quiet, like she doesnt want to talk about it.

    At times su and sh thoughts roll in...
  4. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi Resturtles. Love is a difficult subject and sometimes hard to resolve. Like you say the person might fear the age difference (I'm not judging). Perhaps you need to cool off and allow sometime for her to gather her thoughts. Simply saying sorry and telling her to tell you can talk when is ready to talk. Showing some maturity will help the relationship. Do not worry about it. You have not done nothing wrong and just be there for her.. Take care and keep posting.