Need coping strategies

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Sasha208, Nov 28, 2015.

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  1. Sasha208

    Sasha208 Member

    I joined two weeks ago. Two months ago my husband told me he didn't want to be married anymore. We are still in the same house for financial reasons. He often stays at his new girlfriend's house. This is tearing me apart. I do okay during the day when I'm at work (and I've been working 7 days a week for the past month) but evenings and nights when I'm home alone are the worst. I'm angry, I'm heartbroken and I have no close friends who live in this state. I have always been independent and never bothered other friends or family with my troubles, and I'm not ready to start now. So, SF, please share coping strategies when you're home alone and can't sleep - when you can't turn your brain off and can't stop thinking about the uncertain future, your life has been unexpectedly upended and angry, hateful thoughts about yourself and life in general.
     
  2. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Welcome to the forum. You are hurting emotionally and trying to channel all te hurt by working seven days a week. You need to seek medical advice if you are having trouble sleeping and cannot see anything. No doubt the emotional burden of hurt is weighing down on your shoulders. You are wondering how can I see the person who I trusted everyday just walking out on my life. Your feel broken and no doubt you cry yourself to sleep because of hurt.

    Strategies to cope with such a relationship breakdown is that your have to remain amicable with your ex. (I'm sorry if I describe this person as your ex, I'm trying to be realistic) You bed to sort out the finance situation and have to be realistic. If he is staying at his new girlfriend's house, then ask him to stay there specific days as you need your own space and explain its only fair. You can state, it was his choice in the relationship to break it and he bends to respect your request. If he has ounce of decency then he will respect your wishes. You need to tell someone about the situation like your parents as it help you.

    Each day your face is so hard and you cannot cope being all alone. Being alone only makes your mind go into over drive thinking and that's no good. I strongly suggest that create yourself a timetable where you are occupied such as gym, shopping, going to a theatre. You have to be strong even your heart has being smashed into 1000 pieces. You can overcome this but it will take time. If you feel like self-harming then use the alternatives such as an elastic band or ice cubes.When you feel low, pull the elastic and the sting will remind you that you are a stronger person.

    If you have a hobby and find a local activity group where you share the passion, then that's another coping mechanism. Please keep posting as we can help you get through this tough period in your life. You are important and the virtual hand we offer and let us help you to move forward with your life. Be strong as its about coping with one day at a time. We are here for YOU. Be safe and take care of yourself.
     
  3. bluebanana91

    bluebanana91 New Member

    That sounds absolutely terrible. What helped me was going for a jog at night when I couldn't sleep. It really helped take the edge of the emotions and I fell asleep more easily. Try taking St Johns Wort (be careful with other meds and SJW) and try finding a new and interesting series. When I watched or read something, it took my mind of my crisis.
    Sorry to hear what is happening! much love and positive thoughts your way.
     
  4. robroy

    robroy Well-Known Member

    Hey Sasha, sorry your having such a hard time right now. It helps me somtimes to work out before I go to bed to put me in a good mood. It also helps me to read until I get to tired or I look up nature sounds on YouTube and listen to that to block everything else out:)
     
  5. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    My apologies but hopefully this posting is better for you.
     
  6. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Welcome to the forum. You are hurting emotionally and trying to channel all te hurt by working seven days a week. You need to seek medical advice if you are having trouble sleeping and cannot see anything in the future. No doubt the emotional burden of hurt is weighing down on your shoulders. You are wondering how can I see the person who I trusted everyday just walking out on your life. Your feel broken and no doubt you cry yourself to sleep because of hurt.

    Strategies to cope with such a relationship breakdown is that your have to remain amicable with your ex. (I'm sorry if I describe this person as your ex, I'm trying to be realistic) You better to ssort out the finance situation and you have to be realistic. If he is staying at his new girlfriend's house, then ask him to stay there specific days as you need your own space and explain that's only fair. You can state, it was his choice in the relationship to break it and he needs to respect your request. If he has ounce of decency then he will respect your wishes. You need to tell someone about the situation like your parents as it help you.

    Each day your face is so hard and you cannot cope being all alone. Being alone only makes your mind go into over drive thinking and that's no good. I strongly suggest that create yourself a timetable where you are occupied such as gym, shopping, going to a theatre. You have to be strong even your heart has being smashed into 1000 pieces. You can overcome this but it will take time. If you feel like self-harming then use the alternatives such as an elastic band or ice cubes.When you feel low, pull the elastic and the sting will remind you that you are a stronger person.

    If you have a hobby and find a local activity group where you share the passion, then that's another coping mechanism. Please keep posting as we can help you get through this tough period in your life. You are important and the virtual hand we offer and let us help you to move forward with your life. Be strong as its about coping with one day at a time. We are here for YOU. Be safe and take care of yourself.

    My apologies but hopefully this posting is better for you.
     
  7. Sasha208

    Sasha208 Member

    Thank you all for the suggestions and the support. I hadn't thought about St. John's Wort, so I will try that. I'm not on any other meds, so hopefully it will help. I downloaded several books and movies, and I have my adult coloring book. Right now I'm doing okay - going to try to keep that momentum until it's bedtime.
     
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