Need help moving on.

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by jameslyons, Nov 17, 2008.

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  1. jameslyons

    jameslyons Well-Known Member

    Alright, the depression that started a couple months ago and led to serious suicidal impulses and attempt is finally disappating. But now I'm stuck trying to move back into the world and it's really, really difficult. Whereas before I'd stay in my room all day because of anxiety, sadness and the yah yah yah, now it's the afternoon, I've just taken a shower, and have no idea what to do with myself.

    I'm not comfortable outside, and all the negatives of being a shut in have already happened--failed semester of school, fired, relationship gone, no close friends. I don't want to give the impression that I never leave, I feel comfortable going to the grocery store, going to the cinema or bookstore, but nothing serious.

    I'm having trouble acting like a person. I don't know what to do or where to start. My finances could be much worse, but I only have money for about two more months rent, bills included. I need a job, but I don't know how to sell a job loss and absence due to extreme psychological distress. Emotionally I feel much stronger and confident. For the first time in a long time I'm not thinking and behaving under a chemical upset.

    And what should I do about school? I haven't been kicked out of my classes but I've automatically failed due to absences. Does anyone else have experience with coming back to society?

    I was thinking of confronting the school administration via one of their counselors to address what happened academically. Besides that I'm lost. God, under soft light my arms look terrible! Deep purple scars.
  2. BleuisElBleuis

    BleuisElBleuis New Member

    I failed an entire semester of school due to depression. It ruined my GPA and I didn't know what to do. I went and talked to my professors to let them know that I wasn't a slacker (I felt the need to defend myself) but rather just suffered from severe depression. I was later diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Anyway, one of my professors told me to inquire about a medical withdrawal. I got a letter from my doctor and some other paperwork and talked to the Dean. They found that my reason was sufficient and expunged the grades from my transcript. I then talked to the program for students with disabilities. I was able to take tests in a private room and have extra time since I still found it difficult to concentrate. It doesn't mean that you aren't intelligent. You just have a disorder that needs treatment.
  3. perfectempire

    perfectempire Active Member

    That was helpful to me!:biggrin:
  4. jameslyons

    jameslyons Well-Known Member

    Thanks so much for your input! I'm sorry it's taken so long to get back to you. My laptop's AC adapter blew out. I'm in the process of filling out a medical withdrawal right now. I'm not sure if the administration will expunge my grades--I haven't any clinical proof of depression.

    Hopefully the scars count.
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