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Need help with my paranoia, it's driving me crazy...

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Warrior2089, Oct 27, 2008.

  1. Warrior2089

    Warrior2089 Active Member

    Incase you don't want to read through my whole page of complaints, here's the questions:

    where can I go to be officially tested and diagnosed with paranoia?

    what can I do or take to get rid of it?

    what can I do to fit in and not be seen as weird or insecure, even though I always am, no matter what I do?

    I haven't been diagnosed with paranoia officially, but I know I have it and I've had it for at least a year because of my past. I was bullied a lot as a 5-7th grader for obesity and insecurity. I'm in 9th grade now, 5'9 155 lbs. very good shape. I'm still insecure about what others think and wasn't bullied at all in 8th grade. One cheerleader thought she'd be funny in front of her friends and try to intimidate me during physical science today. This is going to sound weird, but it's the true story so I'm going to say it below.

    She was messing with her friends, trying to seem cool. She like made a stomping motion towards me as I sat and worked. I decided to join in and had a grin on my face as I stood up and playfully said "what, I'm not scared of you" and walked towards her. I walked back to my desk as she said "what is this kid doing?" and her friend goes like "he likes you" and they laugh at me.

    That was the first instance of being any type of bullying in this grade (9th). I'm just scared of any bullying starting up again, which adds to my paranoia. I'm paranoid that EVERYONE is thinking I'm weird, I don't fit in, and that I'm mentally retarded.

    That, and the other event of this one girl saying that I creep her friend out and her friend thinks I'm weird, even though I haven't talked to her in a week just jump-started my paranoia. My paranoia has been off for at least a few months but now it's back, probably in full gear because of these 2 events. Call me weird, retarded, whatever...

    It's 11:55 P.M and I have school tomorrow. I was supposed to be in bed 55 minutes ago, and I feel bad for going against what my mom wanted, even though we argue a lot and I "tell myself" I don't like her. I'm getting used to the idea of staying up the whole night, because just not having to get up in the morning with the same routine.

    Well thanks for whatever good responses you give me. I need them, badly.:sad:
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    You need to have a consultation with a psychiatrist to have him/her make a differential diagnosis...that way you will know what is going on and how you can be helped...big hugs, J