need help

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by suicidal maniac, Mar 7, 2010.

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  1. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

    Hi I was kicked out of chat room for making a stupid comment, and that was the only place for support for me. I have no friends, nobody to talk to, parent's don't want to hear it. I feel like everywhere I reach out people turn away. I feel like I can't hold on any longer. Please help me. Feels like there is more and more pain and it's becoming unberable.
     
  2. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    It sounds like right now things are very lonely for you. Do you have anyone like a therapist or anyone you can talk to? Remember, as long as you post within the rules, you can post here too. You're on 'Forum Access Only', so hopefully the forum can be of use to you and help you through this.

    What is it you need to talk about? Can you tell us about your pain?
     
  3. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

    There is this horrible pain in my heart that feels like it's growing and it feels like it's going to explode.
     
  4. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Is there an emotion attached with the pain?
     
  5. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

    Fear, seems to be the only emotion.
     
  6. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    What is it you are scared of?
     
  7. peacegirl

    peacegirl Well-Known Member

    suicidal, I was also kicked out for making a stupid comment, so you're definitely not alone. They said I would be allowed back in a week and but I'm still banned and it's been months. I hope you don't take this to heart. I'm sure people are not turning away. It's just how you are making it out to be. When we're in a weak state anything anyone says we will use to confirm that we are no good. It doesn't mean it's true.
     
  8. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

  9. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Do you want to elaborate more than that? The more than you can tell us, probably the more use we can be. It also sounds like you need to talk, and maybe talking to us about what's going on for you, may help.
     
  10. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

    That I"m a fag.
     
  11. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    What scares you about being gay?
     
  12. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

    That I'm not able to make love to woman anymore.
     
  13. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Well technically, that would be your choice in terms of whether you wanted to try sleeping with a woman or a man, although it may not necessarily be making love.

    However, often it isn't as black and white as homosexual and heterosexual, there are lots of shades of gray in the middle, so try to bear that in mind too.
     
  14. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

    I realy think I'm bisexual.
     
  15. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Maybe trying to label yourself isn't too healthy for you right now because it sounds like you are very confused. It's often not as black and while as being heterosexual and homosexual, and there are many shades of gray in the middle, which is where most people find themselves. Can you try to accept that you like this person and that person and not necessarily look deeper into labelling yourself? At least until you feel more secure in what your feelings are and who you feel you are.
     
  16. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

    The problem is that I'm also scizophrenic, and I hear this girl moaning in the next townhouse, and I also hear her boyfriend, and I'm constantly comparing myself to him, and I don't even come close becasue I'm a fag.
     
  17. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Is it your schizophrenia that makes you hear the girl and her boyfriend, or can other people hear them too?

    Whatever the reason though, she is moaning because he is pleasuring her. You can learn how to pleasure and girl and you can learn how to pleasure a guy. You can make someone moan like that.

    When we compare ourselves to people we will normally end up feeling rubbish, so try not to compare yourself. Trying to accept yourself for who you are can sometimes be a challenge, but often far more rewarding than putting ourselves down due to comparisons we make and the assumptions that often fuel those comparisons.
     
  18. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

    I can hear her moan in my head, and she is next door. It's the szizophrenia.
     
  19. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Do you think maybe hearing that is somehow related to your issues with your sexuality?

    Do you have any help with your schizophrenia? Are you on meds?
     
  20. suicidal maniac

    suicidal maniac Well-Known Member

    So what are you saying that I might be gay?
     
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