Need to find the courage

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Bruces, Feb 9, 2015.

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  1. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    I need to find the courage to go through with it,everyday seems to get a little worse,I feel for what it will do to my family but there not the one living this total misery of a lifestyle,I noon get tell my family how bad and suicidal I feel as I know it was upsetting them now I just have to keep it bottled up which is worse,I absolutely hate waking each morning knowing
    It's going to be another day of suffering,I need that day to be soon...
     
  2. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    If only I lived in holland
     
  3. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi Bruces, just want to give you a hug :hug: and let you know that I care.
     
  4. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    I have friends and family that care for me,but sadly that doesn't stop the misery.
     
  5. AAA3330

    AAA3330 Well-Known Member

    I can really relate with what you're saying Bruces. I think that mornings are about the worst time for me as everyday I wake up I realize that nothing has changed. My parents are about the only ones that really care about me. They know that I suffer, but there's nothing that they can do. It really makes me feel bad that if they needed help in some way that there would be nothing that I could do. I haven't seen them in a long time because I wouldn't be safe to drive that far. It may seem selfish, but my family isn't the reason that I don't commit suicide. They know that I'm suffering and think that they would understand and my suffering is so great that I just don't really care. I'm sorry to hear that you are still having a rough time and wish you the best.
     
  6. scaryforest

    scaryforest Banned Member

    holland s awful strict about the suicides anyway

    i remember giving you some tips vaguely. did you try any?
     
  7. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    From what I've read holland are fairly lax on the euthanasia laws,it makes me so angry knowing I'm so nuts when I see my friends and family living happy productive lives and knowing I'm such a piece of worthless scum,I can't put into words the hatred I have for my existance.
     
  8. Ne'er Do Well

    Ne'er Do Well Member

    Why is that?
     
  9. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    I hate myself and my existance
     
  10. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    My existance is pointless and I'm bringing my famy down,I wish I could be taken away and never to be seen again
     
  11. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Try and think positively bruces, what could you change to improve how you currently feel about yourself? How are you bringing your family down?
     
  12. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    I walk around in a daze of depression,my life is defined by my problems I'm not a person I'm a walking cell of depression
     
  13. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    I cannot see any point in life whatsoever,I take no enjoyment in things I'm not ever happy or satisfied
     
  14. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi Bruces, I totally understand that you are down but you need to remain strong. You are important and please remember that. Depression is like a window when you suffer alot the window is wide open otherwise ajar on good day.

    We all suffer everyday and we understand what you are going through. Be strong and be safe. ( I know it's easy to say.)
     
  15. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    I'm going to be a head case for rest of my life
     
  16. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    No. You can get help and get treated and you can be like anyone else. Try your best, that is all anyone can ask of you.
     
  17. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    Sometimes people can't be helped my existance is nothing but misery I crave to be dead
     
  18. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    You are craving to be dead because you are in the depths of depression and you need to remember depression IS treatable. In the meantime until you feel better we are here for you :)
     
  19. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    I can't live as a nutter I can't beat the grief or the guilt
     
  20. Bruces

    Bruces Well-Known Member

    All those people that are living perfectly normal lives and then there's us
     
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