NEED to TALK!!

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by ThornThatNeverHeals, Oct 27, 2010.

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  1. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

    I hurt so bad, im cutting again, and am thinking of the pills. I need to talk to someone, mostly in real life. I dont know who to trust, i dont know how to start a conversation. I really only trust 2 people (both teachers) but what happens if i talk to them and they go to my parents? nobody knows my pain, or problems really. Its all inside me, and if i dont talk soon im going to blow. How do i know i can trust someone? How do i start a conversation.
     
  2. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

    and how can i start to trust others again?
     
  3. PiecesMended

    PiecesMended Well-Known Member

    Sorry that you are hurting so much. :sad: Recently a friend of mine found out that I was cutting and he handled it so well, I was so suprised. So I nolonger think hiding it is a good thing. You should tell someone you trust. I'm asuming that you're at school? If you were to tell a councillor then they wouldn't be able to tell your parents without your permission unless your life was in danger.
    Please know that you can PM me at any time.
     
  4. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

    A counsiler was the person who hurt the most. It was a conspiracy and they won. I wish to tell just a teacher, but would they have any obligations? I dont know when my life becomes in danger- it just happens, waves of anger, hurt, or pain, i dont know when they will come. its a miracle ive hidden it for this long
     
  5. PiecesMended

    PiecesMended Well-Known Member

    Well I personally think it would be best to tell one of your teachers but maybe make it sound like you have it under control (I don't know your situation so I don't know...)
    what do you mean by that if you don't mind me asking? I've had 4 different councillors in two years, you are allowed to change and some are rubbish, my first one made me feel guilty for things far beyond my control. You can always find one you prefer/get on better with.
     
  6. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

    No im trying to keep myself intact, and not cut myself to ribbons again. The counsiler threatened to punish me when i told her about my cutting, that she was going to suspend me from school, and tell my parents. yea so much for a coulsiler...
     
  7. PiecesMended

    PiecesMended Well-Known Member

    maybe try to find one who isnt your school councillor? The first two of mine were in-school then the last two were an outside deal and they kinda helped me.
    Sorry I cant be more help to you. Like I said you can PM if you ever need to talk.
    Umm, if you don't mind my asking... :unsure: What country are you in? And about how old are you? You can PM me if you want instead of posting after this... If you want. I'll see if I can help in some way.
    That was wrong of the councillor by the way, :dry: how horrible! Sorry that happened that must make it much harder for you to tell anyone.
     
  8. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

    :patriot: im not old enough to drive. i dont really want to talk to my prents about it though, they expect me to be "as perfect as yoyuur brother" and i want to talk to someone who can help me deal with them in the way of making a real relationship, and working with them, not against eachother as we do.
     
  9. BrokenSpirit

    BrokenSpirit Active Member

    Hello, my name is Rebecca, I am a 29 year old single mother of three who suffers from a bi-polar disorder and, recently diagnosed mild schizophrenia. I take two medications to manage my symptoms, citalopran and, abilify plus I see a psychiatrist twice a week and attend parenting classes. I was abused from the age of three to the age of twentysix by various men in my life so I have trust issues with men. I have attempted suicide twice, both times nearly successful and would have been successful if not for swift medical care. I still claw at my arms when I feel I have failed to punish myself and bite my nails till they bleed when I'm anxious. That's me, tell me about you.
     
  10. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

    Im lazyH or thorn, i dont like giving out personal information. I live in the shadow of my brother, who is either adored or hated by all, and my parents hate that i have a hard time following his footsteps, or more of the fact that i want to make my own path. I prefer to stay in my room and read or talk to friends with similar problems that dont know me personally. I like to cut, and use stragulation, and tend to tear up my fingers also. my happy place is with animals, but my cat is dead, and my new one hates me, my dog doesnt snuggle, and my horse lives far away.
     
  11. PiecesMended

    PiecesMended Well-Known Member

    A fellow animal lover! I feel more at ease with animals than I do people. I have never been hurt as badly by an animal than I have people (well I have been attacked and stuff but animals act on impulse and are not calculating like people.)
    Weirdly enough I also am compared to one of my brothers (I don't know why, I am the only daughter in the family) It pisses me off and makes me feel like utter rubbish. I also cut. I spend most of my time on here or MSN talking to random people at 2am when I can't sleep due to insomnia. Does your cat really hate you? How long have you had it? You have a horse too?! I love horses it's a shame you're so far away from eachother.
     
  12. BrokenSpirit

    BrokenSpirit Active Member

    I feel that way too, as a kid my best friend was a big lab/chow mix named Scooter, I talked to her instead of other people, I took care of all her litters of puppies and spent hours out in the woods walking with her.
     
  13. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

    I dont like hanging out with people, i feel out of my element. My dog doesnt judge me, and my horse wont let me get distracted or anything. I feel like my parents see me as a failure, even though i am top of my class, and everything... I cut most days now, im mad about that because i had stopped for 3 months, but lost it about a month ago. I hope we can talk alot, because i just dont manage friends in RL, i cant stand company. She loves me but shows it by tearing at my throat. She has been mine since june 2009. Yes, do you have an account on Howrse.com? Id love to talk to you there, im there more than here, and you take care of vitual horses with a community of over 4 million players.
     
  14. PiecesMended

    PiecesMended Well-Known Member

    I get what you mean. I'm not a big people fan but I'm more than willing to talk online, I'm friendly really I just can't show it in real life. :biggrin: I just joined Howrse.com. Looks good!
    I'm not sure how to contact you on there though... :unsure:
    If you ever need anything then you can e-mail me any time at: shutupandletmeseeyourjazzhands@hotmail.co.uk
    I check my e-mails multiple times a day even at college so I'll always read it.
     
  15. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    If you tell your teachers, they will most likely tell your parents, because you are a harm to yourself and they have to report it. (I know because I'm a teacher too). I think you should probably talk to your parents so that you can get some help.
     
  16. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

    What is your username on howrse.com?

    I love talking to people online, they can only judge me for me then.

    Thanks,
    thorn
     
  17. PiecesMended

    PiecesMended Well-Known Member

    My username is Scarlet_Rainbow :mhmm:
     
  18. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

    :D i pmed you, at the verry top of the page you will see a bar that says "home" then "forums" then "mail" click on mail ;)
     
  19. ThornThatNeverHeals

    ThornThatNeverHeals Well-Known Member

    yes i know they have to, and that is why i dont talk, i cant face my parents again.
     
  20. PiecesMended

    PiecesMended Well-Known Member

    Did your parents find out before or is it unrelated?
     
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