So, at the start of this year, I had a wonderful Man who made me feel amazing (even though I used to complain because I didn't get to see him very often). I'd started going out again and trying to make new friends etc. Then it all fell apart. The friends I'd tried to make, who I'd thought were really going to be good friends, they turned their backs on me. They didn't want to know me anymore. The people who were important to the wonderful man started hating me also, making things more and more difficult. Then he stopped seeing me less and less. It bothered me that I felt like he was never there for me, and that he didn't seem to want me to integrate into his life properly. Eventually, I had to call it a day: I was wasting my time, my life, my love, pining after someone who just wasn't able or willing to give me what I wanted, what I needed. But all this was MONTHS ago. Why can't I just forget it and move on?? This is crazy. I have new friends again now, I have a new Man now. I am used to people suddenly turning on me and hating me. I know that that will always happen and I will always be starting again because I have lost everything. And now, I want to contact them. Still. More. Its getting worse. I'm thinking about these people all of the time. Why I lost them, how, whether they'd respond if I contacted them, what went wrong, whether they think of me now, what they are doing now, whether they missed me as much as I missed them (not likely, I know). I want to reach out. I always want to reach out. I need genuine advice.