never a minor relapse *may trigger*

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by justmeonlyme, May 13, 2010.

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  1. justmeonlyme

    justmeonlyme Long Time SFer Staff Alumni

    ok so i was going really well i made it 8 days this was huge for me since i had been struggling to go more than 3days for the past like idk quite awhile so 8days was huge... but then today i relapsed.... but that's not what this post is about i was just wondering if anyone else when they relapse after what for you(i no its different for everyone) is a long time do you find you go a little crazy like for me its like i haven't done it in that long and its kinda like i have to make up for it idk its hard to explain... but idk is there anyone else who does this??
     
  2. toffeekitten

    toffeekitten Well-Known Member

    Hey,
    Yeah i get this. I find if I don't give in to my urge on the day I get it and keep putting it off then I cut more and deeper than I have on the times when I didnt try that hard to resist.
    When I go a long time without it and I slip, its usually a big slip becuase I realise how much I have missed it and I feel guilty for neglecting it! :/
    Well done for 8 days!! :D
     
  3. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    Hi Emma, I get this too. I recently hadn't cut for quite a while because it simply wasn't helping me enough, but when I started again it was definitely like I was making up for lost time. I only stopped because I pretty much ran out of skin!

    Mim
     
  4. blazalaza

    blazalaza Member

    I went a month one time. Then I started doing it again and went crazy. I cut so much my thighs were constantly red and sore. I did it every single night religously. I was addictied to it because I missed it so much. I do more and more every time I relapse. I've gone about five months since then. Maybe less. But the scars are still there from winter.

    Very well done on your 8 days tho :)
    Start small, end big.
     
  5. Nox Immortalis

    Nox Immortalis Well-Known Member

    yep definitely. haha well, I don't cut anymore but I used to try to go a couple days which was huge cause I was cutting six times a day.
     
  6. Feenrai

    Feenrai Member

    Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. If I was doing it on a daily basis I could get myself to do only 1-5 small cuts (small being 1-2 inches long)...however, I found that if I went without for a while, when I gave in to the urge again, I felt as though "well if I'm going to do this, I might as well REALLY do it" :(

    I went a month one time, and when I relapsed I ended up doing 26 cuts straight from my wrist to my elwbow...it looked HORRIBLE...and then I got even more depressed and ended up cutting my throat, 3 times, from ear to ear...it was very bad...

    I've gone almost 6 months now, and I'm really, really feeling the urge...but I'm terrified of how much I'll do if I do relapse now, after so much time...:/
     
  7. chloe21

    chloe21 Well-Known Member

    i haven't cut myself for ages now and so i know it was help me and my family out at all
     
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