I've never been in love properly, i'm 35 and i've just not managed to make any kind of meaningful attachment in my life. The loneliness is killing me, or precisely making me want to kill myself. I've had girlfriends, sex, relationships of sorts. I've been in love of a kind with people, but they didn't love me, and other people have loved me without me loving them. But i've never been in love with someone who loved me. I had a bad childhood and have suffered with depression and anxiety all my life. I'm worthless really and no woman would want me. With love i'd be a different person, happier, more confident, not an emotional cripple or social leper. I wouldn't be a perfect human being by a wide margin but i'd have some sense of self belief, a place to be, a direction. I just don't know who i am. I need to see myself thru someone else's eyes cos all i see of myself is worthless.