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never ending

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by letty, Aug 1, 2012.

  1. letty

    letty Banned Member

    how do you handle the paranoia, when it seems like everything your thinking about is real, the people are laughing at you , your friends
    are lying to you , the one you love is cheating on you , it all seems so real but turns out that it isnt, and i end up accusing , and messing things up.
    and then it starts up again later but in different ways it never ends. when this happens like now i cant take it i i dont know what to do i just want to runhide and die, the tormented thoughts
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 1, 2012
  2. MisterBGone

    MisterBGone Well-Known Member

    Give yourself some credit--you're able to recognize when these distorted thoughts happen-& can still distinguish reality from that which is untrue. I don't know what to do: since I've never experienced this phenomenon my self; but I would think, that talking to some one you can trust, might help... Have you tried medical treatment (drugs and therapy)? Maybe they could be part of the solution. One thing I'm sure will be of benefit to you, is to not beat your self up over these things, due to them being a part of your condition, and not a fault of your own. Best Wishes!
  3. letty

    letty Banned Member

    MisterBgone thank you , its just so hard to tell whats the truth and whats a lie, i always beat myself up , i take meds but nothing is working right now, im in a world of lies it seems,
  4. Samara

    Samara Account Closed

    I hope you can understand what I am about to say, because even when we lie to ourselves, and even if we believe our lies or other peoples lies... and even if we exacerbate situations, even i we make a mountains out of molehills etc... no matter how it's swung, the truth can always be found with this method:

    The truth cannot be disproved. It has no discrepancies. It will NEVER contradict itself.

    So any time you find yourself doubtful, or unsure as to the above lines, then don't act on those thoughts. Keep them at bay. Keep them in mind, it doesn't mean that you can't recognize the thoughts, and even the feelings that come with it, it just means that until you can say the above about what you just thought, it should not be acted upon. If that thought relates to yourself, or someone else, or everyone else.. keep that in mind.

    It's hard to remember this in the heat of the moment, but it needs to be learned, and practised. A good example of something that may not be the truth, is if you start thinking that people are out to get you, or don't like you. Yet the same people are still in your life, and still talk to you, or still are around in some form. Like maybe you feel like they have left, but you notice on Facebook once in a while they message, or maybe they text, or maybe they send you emails of funny pictures of dogs etc...

    Someone who "truly" hated you, wouldn't be in your life AT ALL, not in any tiny or any KIND of way. Actions should match the words, should match the "fact" in your head. If the fact was that they didn't care, and didn't like you... yet they were still trying to talk to you, obviously that's not a truth, but just a fear of yours, a deep concern that people will see the "real" you and run off.

    I know you mentioned that it's possible someone has actually left you, but that doesn't mean everyone has.

    It can also help to have just one person who is understanding through all of this, as it seems your emotions are very heavy right now. They are probably all over the place too, and likely influence your actions as well. In such a state, the most helpful thing to you, is just someone who will understand and be patient, even if you lash out at them. Someone who will know it's not "their" fault or your fault specifically. It's just a rough time for you right now... and you are ALLOWED to have rough times. You are permitted such a thing in life.... even if you feel insane right now, or feel like you are just out of your mind... really, you have a lot on your plate, is what it really is.

    You have a lot of things influencing how you think and feel now too, some of those things, as you know, are not things you can get rid of... they may always be there. With that on the side, pushing you and pressuring you all the time, obviously it's going to be naturally hard for anyone in the same situation to even know how to react or sort what they should be concentrating on from what they shouldn't...and what's a real concern from what's not.

    But obviously right now a great many things are a concern to you, the biggest concern being the people who are still there in your life. You need them to stay, you need them to remain... and don't want to ruin anything and drive them away. That's a noble concern, but again, right now I hope those people are patient and understanding with you. Let them know that you need some time to work through things, to try and be the kind of person they can have around too. Let them know that you are struggling.

    Give them the chance to understand where your pain is coming from, so they don't think it's coming out of nowhere, or being dumped onto them. Give yourself that opportunity too, it can help the situation when the other party at least understands that for now you will be upset, or struggling... but at least they know where it's coming from.