New here, greetings, etc

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by maths, Feb 1, 2012.

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  1. maths

    maths Well-Known Member

    Hello.

    How does one describe oneself when one feels utterly worthless and empty? I shall try. 172 cm. 56 kg. Female. Just over 30 years old. Mathematics PhD student. Studying in a foreign country. I've had terrible feelings about myself for at least ten years, maybe more, maybe as long as I can remember. And right now, I just don't know what to do. I guess I just need to say these things "out loud". I'm very much hoping these forums will help. I don't want to die, but sometimes I just see it as completely inevitable.

    maths.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi maths must be so hard for you living in a strange country away from the ones that care about you. Hun you are suffering and need help okay Go to your doctor and get some assessment done depression can be treated and you can have more energy and feel so much better about you hugs Nice to see you reaching out here for support
     
  3. bornslippy

    bornslippy Member

    Hello,

    Out of interest, What country are you studying in ? where are you from ? :)
     
  4. maths

    maths Well-Known Member

    I'm in Germany, originally from North America. Part of my problem with doing something like seeing a doctor is that I don't speak the language very well, it's hard to find a doctor, and I can't help but feel like as an outsider I somehow shouldn't be using the country's system. Like I don't deserve it or something.

    I've actually been away from "home", ie out of the country, for over six years, but have only been living in Germany for a few months.

    Sorry for not being precise, for some reason I feel that I could be identified somehow, there aren't too many female mathematicians. I feel enough shame and humiliation as it is.
     
  5. bornslippy

    bornslippy Member

    No worries :), Maybe you could contact the US embassy and ask them if they know a doctor in your city that speaks English I'm sure they'll have that sort of Information or be able to find it. As for not deserving help I think that's a bit daft the whole point of the healthcare profession is to help people regardless of their nationality, certainly if you used the NHS in Britain we wouldn't think twice about it so I doubt our German counterparts would.
     
  6. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    HI Maths and welcome to SF... thanks for trusting us and letting us inside your life some now.. that takes a lot of courage and you got it hon.. depression can be treated pretty effectively with some meds and good cou=nseling.. liked the idea here of US embassy maybe finding that help for you.. look around this website some.. lots of forums and the chatrooms are busy lot of the time. hope to hear from you again.. tc, Jim
     
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