new here...

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by SoulBee, Oct 15, 2007.

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  1. SoulBee

    SoulBee Member

    hi i'm new here...my boyfriend killed himself 2 months and 3 days ago. i'm in therapy and seeing a psychiatrist and have some really kind family members but i feel like most people in my life feel like i should be "better" by now, i'm trying not to withdraw from everyone but it's so hard and most people are making it very hard on me to be a part of things, not understanding that i'm so sad, that i don't want to go to the places where my boyfriend and i used to spend our time, that i am absolutely exhausted by a normal day of work now...i feel like therapy has stalled because there's just nothing left to say, and i just don't know what to do with myself. not at risk of harming myself...just very sad and stressed out all the time...
     
  2. WhyMeWhy

    WhyMeWhy Well-Known Member

    Sorry to hear about your boyfreind. :( Hopefully the old saying is true:

    "Time heals all wounds"

    Welcome to SF & take care.
     
  3. Puddytat

    Puddytat Well-Known Member

    :welcome: to SF

    i read your story first on the other post, its really harsh. and i can imagine the shock. you cant always know how someone feels even if they are open about it.

    hope you find the strength to get through this, it will be hard but it can be done. you need time to mourn and sometimes that can take years. dont listen to anyone that tells you you should be over it now because its been such a short time. you need to deal w/ it in your own time.

    if you need to chat just pm me
    :hug:
     
  4. numberman

    numberman Well-Known Member

    Ignore the "you should be over it" merchants, they know not what they say...

    What terrible guilt you must feel although I am sure that it was not your fault.

    Use this forum to express yourself.. treat it as additonal therapy..the anonymity of a computer can "loosen the tongue" ( or fingers) better than you may imagine


    Most of us here fortunately have not had the terrible experience you have but you are amongst kindred spirits
     
  5. missdiana86

    missdiana86 Active Member

    welcome here :) ur story is really tough..it teaches others to value sth they already have :blink: be strong and take care, we r all with u, hun
     
  6. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    :welcome: to SF :)
     
  7. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Two months is really not that long ago. There is a grieving process one goes through and I am sure you have probably only begun. Some people move quickly through it and others simply don't. There is no set amount of time one needs to heal. Allow yourself the time to grieve. When you are ready to move ahead, you will know. You won't forget, but things will seem easier to accept as time goes on. I understand what it is like to lose someone this way. If you need to talk, please feel free to PM me. I will get back with you as soon as I can. :hug:
     
  8. liveinhope

    liveinhope Well-Known Member

    The healing process takes a very long time hun, im so sorry to hear of your loss. I to know the pain of loosing a loved one in this way is leaves so many questions, but u r doing all the right things, councelling will perhaps seem to stop but it will resume to it is early days and will take u a long time to heal.
    Welcome to SF and if ever u need to talk please feel free to pm anytime happy to lend an ear
    Tc and look forward to seeing you around the site welcome
     
  9. Marshmallow

    Marshmallow Staff Alumni

    I'm sorry to hear about your loss :sad: :hug: As said before, the healing time takes a very logn tim, some people can deal with it quicker than others, it depends on the person really. So just concentrate on getting yourself better and not what others think or say.I'm glad you joined and i hope to see you around the forum :hug:
     
  10. SoulBee

    SoulBee Member

    thanks for the words of support...helps just being able to talk (write) about it without feeling like i'm burdening people. so many of the people around me seem like they just want to put it out of their minds, and I obviously can't do that...thanks again
     
  11. peaksnvalleys

    peaksnvalleys Member

    Hi SoulBee,

    I feel for your loss too. Everyone's right, healing can take a long time, even after the shock and grief have diminished, you will never forget. Time can only make it easier to bear, but it won't make you forget. There are good people here who are willing to listen to you without offering advice in what you should do. I wish you peace.
     
  12. blade

    blade Well-Known Member

    awwww babes ♥
    sorry to hear that. really.
    but u have to make sure ur future is at peace. try and live the life beatuiful from now on.
     
  13. Darkness N Light

    Darkness N Light Staff Alumni

    SoulBee,
    Hello and first off let me welcome you to the forum. I know exactly what you are going through. I have been where you are now. The only thing I can say is if you have found a good counslor stick with him or her. If the people who you know in your life do not want you to feel a certain way then ignore them. You have the right to feel the way that you feel.
    I wish I could say yes that you will wake up tomorrow and not feel the way you do. It has been almost 6 years now for me and the pain and hurt is still with me. However, I can say that in time it does get better but doesn't completely go away. If you ever need to talk just know that I am here for you. Take care and I love you. :hug: :cheekkiss :hug: :cheekkiss :hug: :cheekkiss :hug: :cheekkiss

    With Love,
    Crystal :hug: :cheekkiss
     
  14. Lead Savior

    Lead Savior Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the forum, it'll be hard for me to emphasize with your kind of sorrow as I haven't lost anyone I care for yet, but I'll try all the same
     
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