Hi. I don't really know how to do this, I'm new. I guess I'll just give everyone the rundown, tell me something if you want. I'm going into my second year of college. I go to a really prestigious, competitive university. Forgive the self-compliment, but most people would say I have a lot going for me. I have friends, I can talk to people, I seem pretty normal and sociable and everything. But I just don't care anymore. I don't. I'm not really in that much pain anymore, either. I just don't want to live my life to keep my parents happy. I want to check it out, go far away, just end it all. I know it isn't ethical, and I would hate to hurt anyone that loves me. But does this mean I should live this empty, tired, boring life? Everything just feels fucking flat. I don't enjoy anything. I am tired all of the time. Exhausted. Dead. I'm 19 and it feels like the last six years have been hell. I can't ever remember not feeling this way, but I'm really good at putting on a normal face so no one knows that I am struggling with this. Honestly, when I go to bed at night, I just fantasize about finally hanging myself in my closet, finally getting it done and getting to sleep forever. I assume people are going to say, "Stay alive and strong" and all of that stuff. But what if it just means nothing to you? Should I get on Prozac and sleepwalk through life and marry some guy I'll end up hating and have three snot nosed kids, just to go through the motions? I hope I don't sound like I'm whining! I've just never done anything like this before, and I thought people who've written and talked a lot about suicide might be able to give me some insight.