Hello, loves.
I just transferred to a new university and it has been so hard to get used to. My roommate is a very extreme trigger but when she isn't triggering me we get along fairly well. I just do not know how to handle when she makes me upset. She is very blunt and has admitted to not caring too much about people's feelings. Because of the serious change in locations and lack of friends and people I can trust, I have been thinking about ending my life quite often. I do not see a point in going on anymore. My new school is known to be the home of very intelligent students and I feel as if I cannot live up to those standards. I fear that I will get so overwhelmed with my challenging classes that I will think of myself as a worthless human being and either self harm or attempt. To make things worse, there are two hospitals on campus and it reminds me every day of my past hospitalizations and my attempts. Very triggering. Other than that, there is a crisis line that I am very afraid of calling because I do not want to go back in the hospital.
HOW DO I DEAL WITH THESE TRIGGERS!?! I really need to work on my self-worth. How can I start liking it here instead of wanting to cry every chance I get. I did track in high school and the track club here really wants me to be on their team. I'm scared, but it seems like a good way to make great friends, get out of my apartment, and let out some of this stress and anger. Should I try it out?
Thanks guys.
I just transferred to a new university and it has been so hard to get used to. My roommate is a very extreme trigger but when she isn't triggering me we get along fairly well. I just do not know how to handle when she makes me upset. She is very blunt and has admitted to not caring too much about people's feelings. Because of the serious change in locations and lack of friends and people I can trust, I have been thinking about ending my life quite often. I do not see a point in going on anymore. My new school is known to be the home of very intelligent students and I feel as if I cannot live up to those standards. I fear that I will get so overwhelmed with my challenging classes that I will think of myself as a worthless human being and either self harm or attempt. To make things worse, there are two hospitals on campus and it reminds me every day of my past hospitalizations and my attempts. Very triggering. Other than that, there is a crisis line that I am very afraid of calling because I do not want to go back in the hospital.
HOW DO I DEAL WITH THESE TRIGGERS!?! I really need to work on my self-worth. How can I start liking it here instead of wanting to cry every chance I get. I did track in high school and the track club here really wants me to be on their team. I'm scared, but it seems like a good way to make great friends, get out of my apartment, and let out some of this stress and anger. Should I try it out?
Thanks guys.