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New SF, depressed, lonely and sad. I figure I'm not the only one.

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by TaterTot, Nov 3, 2012.

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  1. TaterTot

    TaterTot New Member

    Hello, as you read in the title I'm not doing so well. I have been dealing with depression my whole life. It wasn't until a few years ago that it actually started to control my life. I'm 36, single and live alone. I have a great job, but there is a hole in my heart. I'm currently tapering off of the anti-depressants because they don't work. I'm going through hell with that too now. I've tried to off myself once, now for whatever reason, I'm waiting to see what happens when I'm completely off the meds.

    Some times I wish I could be myself again, but honestly, I have no idea who I am anymore. It's not a good feeling and I am alone. This darkness that I feel makes me wonder if it will ever go away.

    So yeah, that's my short story of why I am here.

  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi hun nice to meet you I hope you are going to be ok tapering off you medication hope it is with doctors help. You are not alone now ok you keep talking here you keep reaching out hun Let us know how you are doing each day hugs
  3. TaterTot

    TaterTot New Member

    Thank you for the welcome!
  4. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Hi Tater, pleased to meet you - there are many depressed and caring souls at SF and we all love to help where we can, to give support and encouragement and another perspective. when I was taking my antidepressant meds, I knew they didn't work also - the best thing I've found has been 5HTP - which is a herbal serotonin balancer and helps with getting a good night's sleep - and they do actually work! Great that you have a great job - that is a real blessing! As for the hole in the heart - perhaps think about looking at it as an opportunity to make discoveries - in the area of self-awareness, with the goal of making your mind your best friend - there are plenty of resources to help with this, I can PM you the details of the person who was able to put me on the right track, if you'd like, to kick off with :)
  5. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    Hi tator. Warm welcome to you now..outs of other depressed and partially suicidal ppl on here. Most of us tator.. I have fought severe depression most of my 65 years..I have found the med regiine that helps most of each day thanks goodness. We do know depression intimately..

    You might take a look at all the content in the depression forum.. Chat rooms usually busy also.. Get any questions just let us know..glad to have you with us..hope to hear more from you..TC, Jim
  6. TaterTot

    TaterTot New Member

    Thank you for your support and suggestions. I actually have tried 5-HTP. A couple of years ago when I tried to wean off of Cymbalta, I used a lot of natural supplements, such as Bach flower essences, st. john's wort, and 5-HTP. It helped me get through it. However, once I was completely off of the cymbalta...or so I thought, I had a really bad experience. I felt so depressed that I started taking the meds again just to not feel that way. I still felt depressed, but not as bad. Now I am finally working with a doctor who uses both western and natural medicine. I have to be careful of what I take to avoid serotonin syndrome.

    Some days are better than others, I cry a lot. I am always alone. I try to reach out to my friends but it makes me more depressed. All of my friends are married with children and are well into their own lives. My best friend who lives across the country is there for me sometimes over the phone or through text message, but she has a one year old that keeps her too busy. I don't blame her. I feel like I'm a Debbie Downer all of the time. ugh, anyway. Thanks again.
  7. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Well Tater, you should always be able to find a friend here in SF - someone who wants to listen to your feelings always helps, you can always PM me any time. I know how important it is to have at least one person who you know you can offload to and who will accept all you say without rejecting you or wanting to change you. Tell us about yourself, which country you're in, what this great job is all about, anything you like to do, like movies, reading, spare-time activities, etc. Also, having in mind the goal of making your mind your best friend can be helped along by keeping a journal of your thoughts and feelings, bearing in mind that stinky thinking does result in stinky feelings, so the way out is to not rely on any thinking which is negative, but to tell yourself the truth that can set you free. Focus on the gain and not the pain hun - and we help each other with this on here :)
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