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New to the group and need help.

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by 021206, Dec 4, 2006.

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  1. 021206

    021206 Member

    I just signed up to the forum.

    I'm not really sure what to write, i don't want to write how much pain i'm in, i'm sure you all already know.
    On saturday i overdosed on paracetamol, it turns out i didn't take enough and just had to let my body absorb it.
    I'm not sure if i'm glad i'm ok or not, sometimes i wish i'd died and then sometimes i'm happy i'm here.

    My partner hasn't been very supportive of it, i guess that's his way of dealing with the situation, and because he doesn't understand. I only have one friend who knows and she's the one who watched my kids as i was taken off in the ambulance.

    Should i let people know about what has happened to me? Will that just make things worse? I can't face going back into university at the moment and trying to act normal but then again i don't want to be overly dramatic by telling people, i'm not an attention seeker at all. To make things worse my mum keeps on calling me and i don't want to pick up because she'll instantly know something has happened.

    And lastly, how did people feel mentally and physically after an overdose? I've been really tired and just want to sleep, i keep on getting headaches and stomach pains, and i just feel disorientated all of the time. I just can't seem to function properly at all. My memory seems really jaded and i still feel suicidal sometimes, i'm really scared by how easy it was to take the pills.

    Please help, and sorry i've written so much.
  2. roses

    roses Member

    Hey there hun, sorry to hear about your ordeal.

    I took a paracetemol overdose when I was 16, and was told to do the same thing - let my body absorb it. A doctor explained a few things to me the following day. Your liver/kidneys should have a bit of bother getting rid of waste for a while, but the body is an amazing thing and after about 6 months - 1 year (depending on your state of health), you should be fine.

    An overdose in paracetemol pretty much SUCKS; the way it kills you is that it mushes up everything inside. According to the doctor, it takes a long time to kill you and the people that die from it go through a long, slow death. It can cause your eyes to bleed etc. So, it can be very harmful to your body, but you should be okay, don't worry.

    The stomach aches and wanting to sleep all the time seem to me symptoms of depression rather than after effects of a paracetemol overdoes. Try to contact a good psychologist for help. If you like in England or the UK, you can talk to your GP and they should be able to arrange something for you. I would strongly advise you to see someone. I know it's hard, but it does help.

    Avoid heavy detoxing / detox drinks for some time. They made me get major aches after my overdose.

    Don't worry about your partner. I'm sure he's very upset but is trying to be strong for you, and for him. There's also a stigma with mean and emotions - society expects them to "be strong and manly".

    I would advise NOT telling people. People... suck, man. Keep in mind that most people do not understand mental illnesses or anything involving the mind psychologically. I can see people treating you badly. Yes, most will probably think you are an attention seeker. Another thing I often hear people say is that "people who commit suicide are weak". This is NOT true, but is a common belief. You don't need that extra stress, so don't tell people. You say you've told a friend. this friend seems a good friend and I'd advise just keeping this to her.

    About your mum... well, depending on her personality, it is up to you whether to tell her or not. It may help to tell her how you've been feeling recently, if nothing else. I would definitely advise answering the phone, though. Even if she will know that something has happened, if you really don't want to tell her right now, just tell her you've been going through a really rough period.

    Finally, good luck with everything. Depression and suicidal thoughts might seem like they'll never go away, but they eventually will. It might take a long time, but you can do it. I believe in you.
  3. 021206

    021206 Member

    It is amazing what your body can take, and i think for some reason i felt even more humiliated because i thought 7g of paracetamol would've been enough to kill me or at least cause me some major discomfort. Clearly not.

    I knew about how nasty it is to die from paracetamol, and to be honest i think that it was one of the reasons i'd told my boyfriend what i'd done. I really panicked, i guess i wanted to let him know how bad i was feeling, and yes it was a cry for help, but if that's the case why haven't the suicidal feelings gone away? I thought most people feel really happy to be here if they survive, i just seem to feel like a part of me has died and that now i've crossed the line there is no going back.
    I think the main thing that stopped me though was my kids, i didn't plan anything out for them, and it was really difficult when they were crying outside my bedroom door. They are only 22 months and 3 years old. So i guess it was a really irresponsible thing to do.

    The doctor in the emergency room wouldn't give me any medication and said i'll have to wait at least 3 weeks to see a psychiatrist who will then decide what medication i need. Having to deal with this on my own for 3 weeks is really scaring me.

    My mum could act on either one of two extremes - she'll disown me or the complete opposite she'll freak out. And my dad is enough for her to cope with at the moment so i'm not sure if i want her to worry either. And i think you are right about not telling people, you pretty much reinforced my fears about what they'd think.

    Also what do you mean by detox drinks?

    I'm sorry for writing so much again, and thanks for replying to me so promptly.
  4. slim_to_none

    slim_to_none Well-Known Member

    wow. paracetemol od's. something im somewhat of an expert in.
    ive done that so many times its not funny. im always surprised if i survive the next one. i dont give my body time to recover. and im going to agree with whats been said. its a slow and painful way to die. exceptionally slow.
    and if you do mess up and have actually taken enough to die, you just end up with an IV drip, oxygen, and all a ton of mixtures being put through your body before you just get sent home again.....

    its crazy. i wish i could offer some advice or support. just know that you're not alone. you are most definantly not alone. you've survived. and thats a good thing. your kids need you. your partner needs you. you'd be surprised how many people need you. try writing a list of every single person that your death would affect. i would guess it would be a pretty long list.

    please take care of yourself. please. theres nothing else that can really be said. im in a bit of a state myself so i cant really stop and read your posts.
    sorry. :(

    i hope something ive said will help.
    take care.
  5. TLA

    TLA Antiquitie's Friend

    PLEASE don't apologize for writing long post. I tend to go on and on and on myself. This is an outlet to support you in this time.

  6. 021206

    021206 Member

    Thanks you guys for your supportk you've all been really positive which is what i need right now. I'm still finding it quite difficult but i've decided that today i'm going to actually leave the house for once.

    I also upped my credit card limit so i can buy super nice xmas presents for everyone including myself lol.

    It's nice to be in a good mood, i'd started to forget what it was like :D

  7. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I call this site the International Friendship Forum, cause it really is!:smile: We're all very supportive and loving with our friends here. It makes all the difference in the world just knowing you have friends who understand what you're going thru. Welcome to the forum!!!:smile: :smile:

  8. Ruby

    Ruby Well-Known Member

    I have a problem with overdoses (I'd take one if I could, regardless). When I overdosed on paracetemol (actually kapake) I didn't really have many side effects, apart from abdominal pain that is. Paracetemol overdoses suck though. :dry:
  9. 021206

    021206 Member

    Well i'm back to feeling how i was, i don't get how it's easy to slide back into this...

    My boyfriend really doesn't appreciate me, he just speaks to me as if i'm worthless, i can't take it anymore.
  10. roses

    roses Member

    Well hell there hun :)

    Sorry it's taken so long to reply!

    Hmm, that really sucks! But it's kinda a good thing you live in England, cause if you feel uncontrollably suicidal at any point you can go to your local accident and emergency and say that you're feeling suicidal. I was told that if I did this then I would be able to see a psychiatrist as soon as possible.

    Apparently, a lot of people feel happy they didn't die after a suicidie attempt because they found that there are people who care for them and that they are loved after all. You boyfriend sounds like an absolute twat and perhaps he's one of the reasons you still feel suicidal - he hasn't acknowledged how bad you truly feel. It sounds like you have a form of depression, which could be another reason for why the suicidal feelings won't go away.

    Bless you, hun. You've had a really hard time. I know everything seems really crap right now, but you can get better. It'll take time, but you CAN get better.

    The doctors don't give you medication immediately after an overdose for two reasons:

    1. The medicine might make your body worse when its trying to recover;
    2. It can take a while for a psychiatrist to assess you.

    If you do get mediciation, you'll probably end up with fluexotine (commonly named prozac). This sometimes takes a few weeks (sometimes up to 6-8 weeks) to work, so don't worry if you don't start feeling happier immediately after starting medication. The crappy thing about depression is that it takes a long time to recover fully. Don't worry, though, you can do it!

    Sometimes people just need to talk about their problems and this helps to lift their depression. In fact, 4 out of 5 depressed people find this type of treatment effective. If you DO go on some kind of antidepressant, it'll probably be for about 6-12 months and it usually helps a lot. Just keep thinking during those 3 weeks - I'm gonna get help, I'm gonna get help, I'm gonna get help!

    Maybe it's not such a good idea to tell her at this moment then. Maybe in a few months or so you might feel more comfortable with it? It's important to do confide in one good friend or family member though, someone you trust. If you don't have anyone (you said you were at uni?), then there are usually a few local "self-help" classes dotted around places. These are often a great way to make you feel a little more positive about things. Local newspapers usually have some kind of info in their back pages!

    You usually see a lot of products labelled 'detox tea' or 'detox water' or 'detox ....' whatever on them. I tended to react badly to these, so you might wanna avoid them.

    Don't worry about writing a lot, hun!! The more you type out, the more we can try and help out (and the more you let out!), so write as much as you want ;)

    Hope everything starts getting more positive, hun! x

    P.S: I don't know how long you've been seeing your boyfriend, but if he REALLY doesn't understand and just treats you like crap, you might want to consider moving on. There are a lot of people that don't understand mental illnesses out there, but there are (I promise!) still lots of men that DO understand and will treat you the way you deserve to be treated - like a princess, of course!
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