Ok, I'm at a point where looking for help and people who understand is getting annoying. Any time i seek help, I normally end up being laughed at by the medical profession. they normally don't belive me or pass it off and nothing. I WANT HELP BUT NO ONE WILL HELP ME!!!!!!!!! this even happens in A&E rooms. I have been suicidal in the past and have told myself that i wouldn't let it happen again, but i'm just not strong enough. I'm not upset, I just don't want to do it any more. fed up breathing, waking up, getting into bed, getting out of bed. everything. I currently living on my own, and I have asked my parents for help with this, but they wont help. For instance I would like to move home to get my head together, and my parents both refuse, I am 20 just so you know, and my siblings still live at home. I have had professional help on this before, but it only works if i constantly have help, and I mean 3-5 days a week help. So i just want to escape, and not think any more. my ideal is just black, darkness nothing no pain no nothing. I have gone to A&E before and just told to go home. yes i have told them i want to kill myself etc and tey just tell me to go home. I have no real close friends, I just have my partner (BF) and he knows how I feel but he doesnt know how to help me.'