nice safe quiet drive uh

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by silent_chaos, Apr 29, 2016.

  1. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    My anxiety is so bad I feel reckless. I want to go drive as fast as I can in the mountains. Drift around curves, dodge trees, hug the cliff's But i Wouldn't dare put other people in harms way. With all these mixed feelings and emotions. My heart and brain are enemies. Cause my brain dosnt seem to want to help with regulating feelings and emotions. And has a horrible way of managing thoughts. I have to be the mediator
    I shouldnt have to mediat between emotions and my thoughts, that get carried away. All I do know is they both hurt they are screaming. Which is screaming louder. What do I fix first. My heart is going to stop and my brain is going to explode. Im walking on fire. While grasping ice cubes tightly in my hands.
     
  2. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    I am sorry you feel so bad. But please don't do anything dangerous or harm yourself!

    Could you get some help instead?
     
  3. Johnny Messina

    Johnny Messina Well-Known Member

    You should go and take a nice quiet drive around some nice places... Seriously, put some nice music on and go.. I did it few times and it was always relaxing...

    ps yes I've read your post but you should do what you said in title ;)
     
  4. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    I love, love to drive with my music blasting. but sometimes I get out of hand. Already met a ditch once. I Like to see how fast I can get distance from the car behind me. I have an SUV and it doesn't have take off power but once I get going it has some power. It gives me a rush I feel high. Sometimes I cruse threw town at 25-30 like im supposed to, and I am happy with that. And other times its like an addiction I have to fight off.
     
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  5. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    Yea when I speed with my car through things seem to slow down for me. I can become more focused and the world becomes more clearer speeding at 80-100mph on the highway before I realize I gotta ease off gas or they would just haul me to jail. Then its all back. Only a temporary fix. But it did help for a moment the few times ive been at the edge
     
  6. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    You could go to jail if your speeding, where you are?
     
  7. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    Yep can go to jail for excessive speeds more than 50mph over limit but I'm from Chicagoland area....plenty cars speed around here so 80 is kinda a common speed in a 60 zone for fast lane speeders
     
  8. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    How the hell do you speed in Chicago with that traffic
     
  9. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    Haha...have you been into the area? When you're not driving in traffic in rush hour times its all golden opportunities. People literally speed here. I go 70mph in a 55mph past a cop most of the time and they don't bother pulling us over. Its the norm.
     
  10. silent_chaos

    silent_chaos Well-Known Member

    I haven't been there but I can only imagine! I live in Oregon. I have only experienced California craziness. LA is no game ha ha. The other 700 mikes from here is a piece of cake.
     
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.