I've pretty much been posting this same line every month for a while now, adding 1 more month to the total. I have been unemployed for 5 months since leaving University. Next week I start a temporary christmas job stacking shelves in a shop. University ending meant moving back to my home town, so I have no independence and I have no friends anymore, no social life. I don't have a future, no career, I don't see where new friends are going to come from, I don't know when I will get independence back. I don't feel like I am me anymore, I am just this rotting being sitting infront of a computer screen waiting for a chance to come along. I have applied for well over 100 jobs. I had an interview for one, he said he'd be in touch, he never got in touch, two weeks later they posted the job advert online again, thats how I found out I didn't get it. Knowing people I knew have lives, or people I see with lives makes me feel worse. There isn't really any point anymore. I had a nice little world set up at University, now I am just a small nobody. I don't belong in the real world, it doesn't want me either. I've had a couple of speeches indirectly aimed at me, rants about how people can't give up, look at those in Africa etc. I know that was at me. I've had another about how gay people should come out and not be afraid. I know that was at me, I'm not gay but people at home have never seen me with a girl. I've had things said straight to me about being patient and how its tough but it'll be fine, the thing is they started saying that 4 months ago, the line has ran its course, its time to be realistic, I am nothing.