No Death and a Mental Institution

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by kuriheartsyou, May 28, 2011.

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  1. kuriheartsyou

    kuriheartsyou Member

    Last week I managed to take xxxxxxxxxx Lucky me, my boyfriend decided to plan a "Surprise" for me and found me laying on the ground nearly passed out (earlier that week I had donated blood so I was still low). Or passed out. I honestly don't remember most of it.

    Have you ever had to take activated charcoal? That shit sucks. It basically makes you throw your butt up and then some. And black vomit is nasty. My liver is going to be messed up for probably the rest of my life, there is a giant red slash down my arm joining the rest of the scars, my boyfriend is afraid to even just let me go to the bathroom by myself, and I'm being forced into therapy again.

    Beyond that, I had to spend 3 days in a mental institution for psych evaluation before my parents made a deal to make me go to therapy if it meant I could stay home. I hate therapy. It makes me so mad. They always stick me with a scrub that says dumb things.

    Almost a week later and nothing's changed besides my throat slowly getting better from all of that vomiting.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 28, 2011
  2. Green.Triceratops

    Green.Triceratops Account Closed

    I am sorry you took suicide so far bur am glad your boyfriend found you. Try to make the best out of your recovery and tell the truth to yout therapist, especially if he's he only one you're going to talk to. I know it makes you mad because it made me mad too but it helps if your therapist is nice and means well. Please use the help youre recieving - not using mine at 16 has left me scarred literally.
  3. kuriheartsyou

    kuriheartsyou Member

    Actually, I just kind of sit there and stare at the wall. The therapists I've been to, including this one, are bland and accusing. I have PTSD? No shit. Shut the hell up and let me finish what I was saying. They interrupt and just tell you what's wrong with you as if you didn't already know. The last therapist actually told my parents everything I said despite promising not to tell. I got tired of professionals real fast. :headache:
  4. Green.Triceratops

    Green.Triceratops Account Closed

    Then tell him that lol. Worst be does is refuse you as a patient and you find a new therapist :)
  5. tweetypie

    tweetypie Antiquities Friend

    I hope that you get some useful treatment. You certainly sounded determined to go through with your last attempt. I truly hope you stay safe and get the right kind of help that will work. *gentle hug*
  6. Ritsu

    Ritsu Well-Known Member

    :( I'm so sorry it came to this I pretty much did the same only wth even more pills all I have for it are a fucked liver, a 13 inch scar down my left arm thats perminant and I still miss the person I lost still feel crap about life and still wish I had just walked of from the hospital :( but that would of been stupid life is a precious gift its just about finding out why we are here I wish I knew that and I wish I knew why I have to keep on paying to live and never being free to do the things I want to do due to having to pay to live.
  7. Monoka

    Monoka Well-Known Member

    Hi, im so so sorry you felt that was the only way out.

    echoing what others have said the therapist is there to help, if you cant 'connect' with them then it will be hard for them to help. ask to change therapists, some people just don't go well together.

    hope you get better
  8. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    HalleluYah that you were saved from death through your boyfriend!
  9. Dreamland

    Dreamland Well-Known Member

    You know, I've found that sometimes you have to ask around to get somebody you can actually stand. I've had a few therapists who were either condescending, a little too "meds happy," or completely off their rocker themselves.

    It IS possible, however, to find someone who makes you feel completely at ease. I know it can be hard to find people within insurance networks and money constraints, but I swear to you it is possible to find someone who doesn't just recite phrases "out of the book."

    Also, just as a bit of advice, it's totally pointless to pretend you're fine just to get them to shut up. I did that for a year and a half and just ran up a bill on my parents' behalf to hear a woman tell me I was "so well adjusted." Of course I was lying, so I got nothing out of it but felt worse knowing she was so easy to fool. 6 years later and I'm no happier for having done it!
  10. kuriheartsyou

    kuriheartsyou Member

    It does make me feel a little guilty at times that I have to lie to them all the time. But if I told them I wasn't okay then things would get a lot worse - my mother would become overbearing to the point of no return. Then again, my little stunt didn't exactly make things much easier ">>

    Honestly, I think he's the one reason I feel like I don't want to do anything like this anymore. He cried and refused to leave my side the entire time I was in the hospital. My parents had to forcibly remove him before security did. It was heart breaking and... Almost a relief. I got to see how much he loves me. I don't want to hurt him anymore by hurting myself.
  11. peacelovingguy

    peacelovingguy Well-Known Member

    You are a lucky young lady.

    Had your boyfriend not have called unexpectedly, he may have been one of the 6 carrying the coffin.

    Hope things can get better now you've seen what that road leads to.


    Quite a touching story as it goes - love actually saving someone!
  12. kuriheartsyou

    kuriheartsyou Member

    Actually he came by with food o.o I left the door unlocked, apparently.

    But I know right? It's like a really lame movie.
  13. I have had activated charcoal and you're right, it's nassssssty. My teeth were black for 2 days. It looks the same coming in and going out.
  14. Ritsu

    Ritsu Well-Known Member

    I will say you were lucky to get just the charcol I had to have IVs due to the fact it was too late for the charcol and all I will say is ouch ouch ouch.
  15. lightbeam

    lightbeam Antiquities Friend

    I got charcoal, and IV's... not fun...
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