No energy to live

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by CryButterfly, Mar 8, 2014.

  1. CryButterfly

    CryButterfly New Member

    I have no energy to live. Everything seems so dificult and boring. I no longer can love another being.*
    I have been depressed most of my life. I have been on antidepressants for the past 8 years but discontinued in January. I feel that I cant *recover from the end of my marriage that happened 2.5 years ago. I made the decision to end it and now i can not cope with the feelings of guilt. I have been making a mistake after another since. I lost everything slowly.*
    I feel so stupid and weak when I read some very tragic stories on this site.
  2. soulreaper

    soulreaper Well-Known Member

    find a way to rebuild your life while keeping positive, go out do stuff , who knows maybe youll find a new love while out and about.
  3. Twocky61

    Twocky61 Banned Member

    Welcome to SF CryButterfly
    Your situation is no less tragic than anyone else's on here
    As Soulreaper says, try to keep positive & do things & meet people

  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Talk to your doctor ok maybe get back on the antidepressants a new one and get some therapy to help you get on a different path ok It is hard when one keeps seeing them self sabotage but with help you can rebuild ok talk to your doc
  5. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    hi crybutterfly. I am sorry you are so depressed. Oh how I wish you could get on the right antidepressant and counseling. Is there a possibility that you can reach out again for help irl? I am glad you are here. I always think that joining this community is a smart and good decision. People here know pain,of course. And no ones pain is less significant than others. so please try to not judge yourself against the stories of others. Pain is pain. Deep depression is horriffic.

    Are you getting help to try to work through the ending of your marriage? Sometimes thing like this can bring up all kinds of pain, grief,depression that was just under the surface. for some it can take years to recover. But yes they can recover and really live again.... or for the first time ever.
  6. Cat of Spades

    Cat of Spades Well-Known Member

    It seems to me if you have come to realize that you have made "one mistake after another" that is a great start to improving your life. Just think of it like "I have made all of the mistakes I need to make, from here on out since I have learned from each and every one of them, it's going to be smooth sailing", or to put it in another wording; you have learned a lot from your life and now is the time that you can make use of all of that knowledge. Take the good and keep it, take the bad and leave it behind but not without learning from it.

    Stay positive!
  7. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Crying butterfly,
    I'm sorry to hear that your are down. Circumstances and situations do drag us down which makes us think it's all our fault. Sometimes from our bad experiences we can become stronger and positive (one hopes). It's hard but starting at one day at a time is the beginning. It's hard being strong and feeling hurt at the same time. You got to stay positive and keep thinking about the good times. Just keep posting as we all in a similar situation on this forum. With the care and support from each other it helps each one of us to get through the day. Please take care and respect.
  8. CryButterfly

    CryButterfly New Member

    Thank you all for the support. I discontinued the medication after I moved to Brazil which *was a big mistake. I was living in the US where I had a job and health insurance. I took*ayahuasca two times in January after I stoped the medication which helped a lot. The depression is just caming back slowly. I started to see a therapist with EMDR training a few weeks ago. I had decided to pursue a natural and long lasting treatment but sometimes I feel that I cant wait.

    Take care
  9. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    I think its great that you are in therapy doing EMDR. Do you think that antidepressant while you are working on things may be a good idea?

    Sometimes stuff comes up during therapy which can make it even worse temporarily, as things come up to be released. But for healing I totally respect the work you are doing. AND I wonder if taking antidepressant would be a wise course of action, in addition to the EMDR/therapy. I totally support you in doing that. Especially when you know the "class of medication" that did help.