no feeling of support

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by hoophula, Mar 22, 2013.

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  1. hoophula

    hoophula Active Member

    My own boyfriend said, "Oh, you're going to commit suicide?, please" You say this all the time." But he doesn't see how that hurts me even more, and makes me want death deeper. Says I am so selfish and care only about myself.....I don't care at all, that is the point, I hate myself.
  2. Theodora

    Theodora Well-Known Member

    So sorry you feel so bad. Glad you're very slowly trying us out. Hope this community can help you.
  3. PaigehBabeh

    PaigehBabeh Member

    If he isn't supportive of you sweetheart, why are you with him? There's so many people out there who would be there for you. Your boyfriend obviously doesn't understand, maybe he hasn't experienced the feeling of loneliness like us here have. We're here for you, don't feel alone.

    - Paige.
  4. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    hey hey hey hoophula, you hang out with us here at sf !! Get to know this community. Because we will care. let us get to know you. Okay?

    I am sorry your bf is so unaware of how painful these feelings are. Unaware that this is real. So many people think as he does. They do not understand. My own family did not understand when my grandmother used to say these things. But we here will understand. So will you post here often? Let us care about you. Become part of this community. Okay? Will you do that? I hope so
  5. Much afraid

    Much afraid Well-Known Member

    Please keep sharing ~ it helps a lot to talk with others who understand those feelings (having felt them too.) ♥
  6. exkend

    exkend Well-Known Member

    Your bf doesn't have the first clue about emotional pain or psychological distress. Unfortunately he is not able to either understand your pain or be able to help you in this particular area. Not everyone we love has the know how to help, which means one has to be more patient and understanding with them then normal. See your doc or a therapist.
  7. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    That sounds like a lot of people in my life...they can't really understand what it's like unless they've experienced it firsthand. Explain to him why you feel the way you do, and that your feelings are serious, and you feel hurt by his lack of support.
  8. skinnylove911

    skinnylove911 Well-Known Member

    why are you with someone whose not gonna support you and get you this, he prbably doesn't know how it feels o be your position i can so relate hun ;) just remember you are not alone and if you ever like ending it then please speak to your crisis, cpn, cmht or get your self to emergency room/a+e. if he offers to take you to hospital then accept it and get the help you desperately need.
  9. Butterfly

    Butterfly Sim Addict Staff Alumni SF Author SF Supporter

    Often, people are scared by what they don't understand. My fiance has been very unsupportive in the past when I have been open about my suicidal thoughts, depression and psychosis. He was scared because he didn't understand. He didn't know how to help. He didn't know why he couldn't take away the pain. How I was feeling, it did hurt him, not because he thought I was being selfish, but because I was self destructing right before his eyes and he didn't know what he could do to help. He was frightened of what might have happened, and losing me to suicide. I told him that I didn't want saving, I knew he was scared and didn't understand but that what I need when I am going through a crisis is not him having a breakdown and lashing out at me, but sometimes all I want is a hug and someone to tell me that I can get through it and that he will be there for me. When I was honest about what I wanted from him, he listened, and he has never lashed out at me since and I have been through several crisis points since then.
  10. exkend

    exkend Well-Known Member

    I would just like to note that just because your bf isn't very knowledgable or helpful regarding your mental-emotional health, is no excuse to dump him. I'm sure he has many wonderful qualities, just remember that we don't know everthing, so go gentle. You wouldn't expect him to turn around to you and say your not good enough because you don't enough about his mental-emotional state. As long as your loved and cared for the rest is time and details.
  11. sparksman

    sparksman Banned Member

    wonderful qualities? like what turning his back on his girlfriend. There is nothing that can make up for that. He won you a stuffed animal one time but was like "I don't care" when you need it the most. I wouldn't go easy on that. I'm desperate for a girl and all but if a chick flat out told me she didn't care if I was upset then even as pathetic as I am would not want to be with her.
  12. exkend

    exkend Well-Known Member

    I get your point. All I'm trying to say is that if your not qualified or worldly enough to understand and support someone who is going through an emotional crisis then, hopefully, you should use use caution when judging them through the lens of pain. Your absolutlely right I also believe that rejection and betrayal are devastating, however I suggest reading the context to the behaviour, in this case possibly fear. That does not mean ignore it or brush it under the carpet. Just think very carefully on it and then decide if it was weakness of character or something else.
  13. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    I agree with this.
  14. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    I agree with this.
  15. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    If you go to a therapist perhaps you can consider a joint session so you and the therapist can help him to understand how you are feeling. Butterflys post may be on target for your situation, or not. But it might be good to try to figure that out. If that feels right to you. Please make sure to listen to your own discernment. Yes?
  16. sparksman

    sparksman Banned Member

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