No future

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by lost_child, Apr 24, 2009.

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  1. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    I had to have more test's done today, even my body is rejecting the idea of help, they tried and tried to get blood and only managed to 1/4 fill the 3 tubes needed.

    Nothing seems to be going right at the moment, I'm about to lose my job due to medical grounds (once the p/doc tells them that the only way I will ever "improve" is to attend this unit for 3 days a week..reality is a business at the moment can't afford an employer like me)..I'm 17k in debt, I'll lost the house because I won't/can't afford to pay the mortgage. The person I share with and I haven't spoken for 5 weeks so its very unsettling at the house, its not safe here either. Each week the debts are going up, each day my health is getting worse, each day I'm taking more tablets then I should be, each day another part of me disappears. So misunderstood, nobody understands me and I don't understand me. i feel completely lost in the world and the only way out of it, is to end it I can't see anything else. I know its stupid, pathetic, selfish but at this moment I just want to walk away from life, say goodbye to everything and everyone and die. I am so tired of feeling this way. makes no sense to me either.

    I've no idea what to do, where to turn.
  2. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    First I just want to say that I like the quote in your sig. It's so true.

    I'm sorry you're going through so much. I don't know what your health problems are, or the details of your situation. But I hope you're able to hold on. If you ever want to talk, PM me anytime.
  3. poisonedresistance

    poisonedresistance Well-Known Member

    it all sounds like a lot on.

    Can you not try talking to your house mate, try and see if ther is anything you can do?

    maybe you need another house mate to try and alliviate some of the household costs at the moment.

    Have to spoken to the citizens advice?
  4. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    Its been going on 3 years since we first moved in together but I was blind to what she was doing, I thought her hitting me was ok, I thought her telling me who I can be friends with was ok, I thought her telling me that I shouldn't talk to my mum was ok, I thought when she said to move away from the area it was because she thought it best for both of us but now I realise it was all very wrong, and now were stuck in a mortgage together for at least 18 months, she won't sell or buy me out either.

    CAB can't do anything, I've spoken to them briefly but ultimately unless she agrees there's nothing we can do.
  5. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Hiya! :hug: I'm glad to see you posting again, but I'm sorry to see that the situation is not good.

    I'm sorry to hear there's pressure on you at work. Are there any human rights laws for people with physical/mental health disabilities that would protect your job? (There are such laws where I live.) Perhaps talk to your p-doc and explain that you're worried you will lose your job. He/she will likely know if there are ways to protect your job and what agency you could contact for more help with that.

    With regard to your house - could you rent out your "half" to someone else and you move to a different place? (You're right that it's NOT ok your housemate has hit you. If she is still doing that, I hope you can find a way to move out soon.)

    Feel free to PM me - whenever - to chat or vent if you want.


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