No girlfriend, no reason to live for.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by oneloveshift, Jan 3, 2014.

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  1. oneloveshift

    oneloveshift Member

    I can't ind my place in this messed up society. The city in romania that i live in, simply sucks. It's full of liars, deceit,and fake people. I just cna't seem to bond trully with anybody.

    I have no friends, and i live in the wrong neighborhood.
    Everything in my life seems wrong, except for my past.

    And i always end up talking to the girls in my past(in my mind, notreal life), hoping to discover true love, and happy.

    And i always end up talking to the exact same girls, and in the exact same order as before, and, at the end, understand that i don't fit into any circles, except one that fits most of my criteria.

    All i ever wanted in life was a big family. And elegance.

    Where the fuck are those friends with which i get along flawlessly? I have... sacred knowledge. I know that when we're in a good state of mind, and relaxed most of the times, diseases just don't stick to us.

    I'm skinny, and most people can beat the shit out of me. Most people spell their frustrations on me, just cause i don't want to fight them.
    And i don't have the friends with which just to talk, and hang out on a daily basis.

    I'm 29, and made a promise to myself: if i don't find the friends to love, and be loved by, at age 30, I'm doing it.

    All i truly neededed(and what we all need) is a best friend, or a really awesome girlfriend to share EVERYTHING with.

    I'm a total looser.
  2. oneloveshift

    oneloveshift Member

    Funny thing is, i have some ideas to revolutionize the entire world.

    For instance, i live in a bad neighborhood. But what nobody understands is that people combined make up a bad neighborhood.

    When you don't trust your neighbors... bad shit is bond to happen.
  3. MessengerFromHell

    MessengerFromHell Well-Known Member

    I had the same thoughts as you. There are many other thubgs you can live for besides the love of your life. Though I still yearn for him. But if it doesnt happen, it doesnt. I am ugly and accept my fate.
  4. mark b

    mark b Well-Known Member

    it took me 55 years to find true love and i screwd it up in the last two years. so when you do find it, treasure it.

    you have very good english skills in your post, so possibly come to uk? usually i would not encourage migration as i have worked with many polish people as well as some romanian recently, finding it hard to get work with minimal language skills.

    if you do come here it will not be easy but wirth considering.

    good luck.
  5. oneloveshift

    oneloveshift Member

    I've learned to adapt.

    Life isn't easy. I would go to uk. just for the changing of the stupid people.

    I wish to write a book. A novel or something, bu, though, romanians have no time to listen to my heart..
    So my thoughts are all screwed up.

    Haven't managed to understand what true love is, even if i had two perfect girls. They were so amazing...

    Both of them. One carries my child. I ran away from her, because of my screwed up family.

    everywhere i go, i get, and give ideas about revolutionization of nearly anything.
    Show me a product, and i'll tell you how to make it better.
    People inspire me.

    And yet, nobody sticks to me, because i don't know what type of job i would like to do.

    I can't find my place in this society.

    I'm surrounded by ... all the wrong people.

    You're 55... Just like my 56 year old mom.
    Lol. Not implying anything. Just that my dad died a while ago(3 years) and, the worst part is, i never really liked my father.

    He was a car mechanic. Always dirty, and under dirty old cars. So it's hard to imegine what went wrong with our father son relationship.

    Why don't we, all the suicide bombers, unite, and work together on building something? Like an empire?

    A huge empire of sorrow. We'll together figure out a way to transform it into happyness.

    Let's make a suicidal Magazin. Who, I'm wondering has enough cash to open up a suicidal story? An empire built on sorrow.

    We need to unite with our same kind.

    All my life people ran away from me. Don't know what i did wrong.

    Including my cousins.

    So... suicidal Magazine?

    We would post some stories for people to read.

    Ofcourse, with happy endings. We would find people who want to commit murder upon themselves, aske them why, and fix them, in some ways.

    Maybe even do a suicidal hotline. With dozens of listeners. Including police officers, in order to prevent any damages....

    We can have so many sollutions, if we want to. Together. I say, unite yourselves. Through me. I have had a dream to become a singer. Like this guy: Oliver Sykes. But i never had the courage to cry like that through a song, cause i lacked the family.

    In my case, my salvation would be a big and happy family.
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